A House Divided
by Hannahfour
Summary: When Brian lets his superstardom get to his head it causes a problem within the family that makes brothers choose sides. When Guthrie tries to copy Brian it lands both him and Heidi in a whole mess of trouble.
1. Chapter 1

"Guthrie are you sure you want to do this?" I ask.

We're sitting in the jeep and Guthrie is putting the key in the ignition. He starts the jeep, looks at me and smiles. "Heidi, this is the best way. Besides, Brian does it. What could go wrong?" He faces forward again and looks straight ahead. "Crane's been teaching me and I think I can do it. It's just hard to reach the pedals sometimes."

"Ok, but don't drive too fast," I say and I grab on tight to the seat.

"Maybe you should put your seatbelt on," he says laughing as the jeep lurches forward.

"Are you kidding? No way! I wanna be able to jump out if you crash into something." I hold on tighter and think back to a few days ago when this mess we're in all started.

* * *

"This is so boring Hannah!" I tell her as I'm playing around by jumping in and out of the jeep. We're parked on the sidelines of the field where my brothers are getting ready to practice mountain polo. There's a huge game next week that they're playing in, so right now they're getting their picture taken for the newspaper. I jump out of the jeep and run over to where Guthrie's standing. "Let's go play Guthrie," I say. "I'll go get a ball and we can play soccer. C'mon, they're not using the field right now."

"No. I want to watch them get their picture taken."

"But this is boring!" I watch and listen for a little bit. They're talking about the big game next week and how Brian is the superstar on the team. I look at Guthrie and he's staring at Brian and smiling really big. I walk over to the equipment and pick up a ball. It looks just like a volleyball but it could be used like a soccer ball. It's perfect for kicking. I bring it over to where Guthrie is. He's still staring at Brian.

"C'mon! Let's play soccer. This...is...boring!" I throw the ball at Guthrie but since he's not looking at me it hits him on his side.

"Knock it off Heidi! I wanna watch!" He yells.

"Fine! I'll play by myself!" I start walking towards the goal and then I stop and turn to look back at Guthrie, "you wish you were the superstar of the team. Just like Brian. That's why your staring at Brian like you're in love with him!"

"You're just mad because you can't play!" Guthrie yells back.

"Duh! That's why this is so boring! But when I'm older I'm going be the best player of this family. Better than you, better than them, even better than your superstar brother Brian!" I stomp off towards the goal and kick the ball over to it. This isn't going to be any fun to play by myself, because now I have to go get the ball. I look back and see the newspaper man is leaving and my brothers are getting ready to practice.

"Heidi, bring the ball back," Evan calls over to me.

"Why? You have five other balls to play with. I'm playing with this one!"

"Bring it back and get off the field! We're gonna practice now!" Evan yells back.

I drop kick the ball way out past the field so Evan has to go get it. "Get it yourself," I mutter. I stomp back to the sidelines and ask Hannah, "can't we go home now?"

"No, we're here to watch them practice," she says.

"Can I go home then?"

"No."

I sit down on the grass and watch them practice. I can't wait until I'm old enough to play. It looks like so much fun, hitting a ball with a polo stick while riding on a horse. Guthrie's watching too and cheering loudly. I watch Brian play and he's really good. He scores and I hear Guthrie say, "he takes the shot and POW! Right past the goal posts." Oh brother, I think.

Then Brian yells over, "that one's for you Guthrie!"

"Hey, what about me?" I yell.

Brian laughs and yells, "next one's for you Heidi."

Then Guthrie looks at me and says, "He's the best! He's the absolute best!" Then he stares back at Brian and just keeps smiling at him. I look at Guthrie's face closely and then I look back at Brian. Yeah, he's good. He's definitely the star on the team, but the way Guthrie's looking at him you'd think he was a god or something.

Brian comes running over to us on the sidelines. "How come you're not playing?" Guthrie asks.

"We gotta let Ford get some practice," he says. He picks up his canteen and takes a drink.

"You were great out there Brian!" Guthrie says. "We're gonna beat that team from Saddle Creek!"

"Yeah!" I yell.

Brian laughs and swings me up so he's holding me. "You got that right lil sis!"

Adam rides over on his horse. "Brian, you're supposed to be watching and paying attention. We're still working on plays and you gotta be over there to learn what they are."

"Calm down big bro! I got this. I know how to score on these Saddle Creek boys. You guys just keep practicing, you need it more than I do." Guthrie and I laugh as Adam shakes his head at Brian and rides off. He looks a little mad.

"You're so good Brian you could probably beat them all by yourself," Guthrie says. And we all three laugh.

* * *

When we get home from practice Guthrie and I decide it's time for us to practice mountain polo. We put on the helmets but they're a little too big so they cover our eyes a little. I get up on my horse, Lucy, and Guthrie hands me a polo stick. It's heavy for me but I can hold it pretty well. Guthrie hands me his stick so he can get on his horse and I hold it for him. Two sticks are really heavy, but I hand it to him when he's ready for it.

We ride over to the ball and we call out where the goal is. It's in between two bales of hay. "Ok, pass me the ball," Guthrie says.

I lean down and try to hit the ball with my stick, but it's hard to do. So I hold the stick with two hands and lean down a little bit. Guthrie's laughing at me but after the third swing I finally hit it somewhere kind of close to Guthrie. Now it's his turn to hit it, and my turn to laugh. He hits it and I ride Lucy over to it but I can't swing with her running. I can barely hold on to her reins and the stick. This is getting really frustrating. I stop Lucy and try to hit the ball. I miss and Guthrie laughs.

"Quit laughing!" I yell at Guthrie.

"I thought you were going to be the best player in our family," he says laughing.

"You're not very good at this either!" I yell and I bring back the stick and swing it as hard as I can right into Lucy's leg. She rears up on her hind legs and because I was holding onto the stick with both hands I fall right off her and land on the ground right on my back. I lay there stunned.

"Are you ok?" Guthrie asks. He's sitting by my side.

I look up at him and I feel hurt. I lay there not wanting to get up yet. The helmet slipped down over my eyes and cut the top of my nose. I push the helmet back up. I feel like crying but I'm trying really hard not to. I just stay laying there.

"Heidi, are you ok?" Guthrie asks again. He starts to shake my arm a little bit. "Say something! Are you ok?"

I nod my head and slowly start to sit up. I can see Evan and Ford running over.

"Heidi, are you ok?" They're asking. I just sit there staring at them.

"What were you guys thinking?" Evan yells. "You're not supposed to be playing with this stuff!" He starts picking up the equipment and carrying it over to the rest of the pile.

"Are you ok, Heidi?" Ford asks.

"Yes." I stand up and I feel my back hurts. I've fallen off horses before, just not on my back. I wipe at the cut on my nose and it stings a little. I throw the helmet on the ground and slowly walk over to a bale of hay and sit down.

"You can't play with this stuff, it's too dangerous," Ford says while walking over to me. He sits next to me. "Are you sure you're ok? You have a pretty bad cut on your nose. You should let Hannah look at it."

"No way. She'll put that stuff on it that stings. And why can't we play with that stuff? Nobody ever said we couldn't."

"Yeah, nobody ever said that," Guthrie says.

"Well I think they're gonna tell you now," Evan says walking over to me. "Are you sure you're ok? It looked like you fell pretty hard. You really should go tell Hannah." I just sit there and start crying just a little bit because my back hurts. "C'mon, I'll carry you in," he says picking me up.

* * *

Evan carries me into the kitchen where Hannah is.

"What happened?" She says rushing over. Evan puts me on top of the kitchen table so I can sit on it and be up high.

"She fell off Lucy," Guthrie says.

"She fell off really hard and landed on her back," Ford says.

"Aw," she looks at my face and wipes the tears away that are running down my cheeks. "Evan go get me the antiseptic."

"No, I don't like that stuff," I say pulling away from her hands.

"I know. But that's a pretty nasty cut."

Evan brings her the stuff and she gently cleans the cut. "Why don't you go rest on the couch for a while and rest that back of yours," Hannah says. "Maybe one of your brothers will do your chores later," she says smiling at Evan, Ford and Guthrie.

Evan carries me to the couch just as Adam and Crane come walking through the front door.

"Where's Brian?" Guthrie asks. "He said he was gonna show me how to make a goalie shot when he came back from town."

"He's still in town," Adam says smiling over at Hannah.

"Why?" Guthrie asks.

"Oh, let's just say he met a few girls that were star struck when they saw him," Crane says laughing.

"We're they pretty?" Evan asks.

"You know they were," Ford says laughing and Crane nods his head.

"I think this superstar stuff is going to his head," Adam says. "Some guys in town told us they got a lot of money riding on this game and Brian told them he'd make sure we won."

"Well when's he coming home?" Guthrie asks again.

"I don't know, but I'll tell you what, he'd better be back to do his chores before dinner," Adam says. Then he looks at me laying on the couch. "What happened to you?"

"She fell off Lucy and landed on her back," Guthrie says.

"How'd that happen?" He asks. "You haven't fallen off a horse in a long time."

"Lucy reared up and Heidi fell off," Guthrie tells him.

Adam sits on the edge of the couch and looks at me. "Wow. Was she spooked by something?"

"She hit her with a polo stick," Guthrie says.

Adam looks over at Guthrie. "What?"

"We're trying to learn how to play mountain polo so we can be superstars like Brian. We were practicing."

Everyone laughs. "I think you two should stop trying to be superstars like Brian, and focus on just being two little kids," Adam says smiling.

"I'm not little!" I yell. Normally I would stomp my foot when I say that but since I'm laying on the couch I push my foot into Adam's side. He laughs and rubs the top of my head with his hand and I smile. Then he says, "you two don't touch the polo stuff." And he gets up and starts walking over to the kitchen.

I look over at Guthrie and he's not smiling. "How are we supposed to play like Brian if you won't let us practice?" Guthrie sounds a little mad.

Adam turns around, "don't touch the stuff. You'll have plenty of time to become the superstar when you're older. Why don't you go do your chores."

Guthrie storms out. I wonder why he's so mad.

* * *

At dinnertime Brian's still not home yet. I look at Guthrie and he looks sad. "When's Brian coming home?" He asks.

"I'd like to know that too," Adam says.

Everyone else laughs, and someone says, "You know Brian, when he finds a pretty girl he seems to lose track of time."

"And this time there were two!" More laughs. I look at Guthrie and he's not laughing. I wonder what's bugging him.

"What's he doing with the girls? He's been gone all day." I ask. More laughing. "What's so funny?"

"How do you know he's not out there hurt somewhere?" Guthrie yells.

Everyone looks at him. "Geez Guthrie, relax," Crane says. "He's fine. I'm sure he'll be home before you know it."

"He'll come home drunk and happy!" Daniel says, and everybody laughs.

"It's not funny!" Guthrie yells and gets up and runs out the back door.

"I think someone's worried about his idol," Hannah says, and she gets up and goes out to Guthrie.

I wonder what that means. More importantly I wonder if Brian's ok.


	2. Chapter 2

I'm already for bed and Brian's still not home yet. He's supposed to tuck me in tonight. I go downstairs to Guthrie's bed and sit on it. He's laying in bed with all the lights on just staring at the door. I've never seen him look so worried before.

"Are you ok?" I ask him.

"I wish Brian was home. I hope something bad didn't happen to him. Why won't Adam and Crane go look for him?"

"I don't know. Do you think he got in an accident? Maybe he couldn't find a ride home and he's walking home in the dark and he got hit by a car and he's lying in a...,"

"Shut up Heidi! You're making it worse!"

I look at Guthrie and he looks like he's going to cry. "I'm sorry. I'm sure he's fine." I give him a hug.

Adam yells from upstairs, "lights out Guthrie." Then he sees me and says, "what are you doing down there? You're supposed to be in bed."

"Can't," I say while shrugging my shoulders. "Brian's supposed to tuck me in. I'll just wait down here for him."

"Nice try. Get up here and I'll tuck you in."

"I'll be back down in a little bit," I whisper to Guthrie. And I get off his bed and run up the stairs. When I get to Adam he swings me up to hold me and carries me to my bed. My room's really small. Just my bed and my dresser fit in it. I have a little pink lamp on my dresser that my mom and dad bought for me when I was a baby. I always sleep with it on. Adam sets me on my bed and turns the lamp on. I get under the covers and he sits on my bed.

"Story or song?" He asks.

I shrug my shoulders. "Where's Brian?"

He sighs. "I don't know. Are you worried about him too?"

"Do you think he's drunk and walked home and got hit by a car and is lying in a ditch somewhere bleeding to death?"

Adam smiles a little bit and says, "where'd you get such a crazy idea?"

I shrug my shoulders again. "I don't know, they just pop in my head. What if he got drunk and he's wandering around town trying to find his way home but he can't remember where it is so he gets a ride from a stranger and the stranger's bad and he kidnaps Brian and...,"

"Enough," Adam says laughing. "You've got some imagination! Is that what you and Guthrie were talking about down there?"

"Not really. I think Guthrie's mad at you," I tell him.

"Why?"

"Because he thinks something bad happened to Brian and he's mad you're not looking for him. When we get lost you guys always look for us."

"First of all, you're ten and Guthrie's twelve. Second, Brian's not lost. Brian's an adult and I'm sure he's just fine. Now, story or song?"

"Story. Tell me a story about how Brian became a mountain polo superstar."

Adam groans. "This could take a while."

I lay there listening to the story and when Adam's done he kisses my forehead and says goodnight.

"Goodnight," I tell him and I close my eyes and pretend to go to sleep.

* * *

As soon as I'm sure everyone's asleep I sneak downstairs to where Guthrie is sleeping. He has his flashlight on and it's pointed at the front door.

"Hi," I whisper.

"Hi," he whispers back.

"Are you still worried about Brian?"

"Yes."

"I'll wait up with you."

We lay there quietly watching the front door, trying to stay awake.

* * *

We fell asleep because I get woken up when I feel someone squishing me. It's Brian and he doesn't know I'm here because he says, "scoot over Guthrie you're on my side of the bed."

"Guthrie wake up!" I shake him. "Brian's home!"

"Sh! Don't wake everyone up!" Brian says. "What're you doing down here twerp?"

Guthrie sits up. "Brian! You're home! I was worried about you! Where were you?"

"Were you lying in a ditch somewhere?" I ask.

"What? No! Where would you get a crazy idea like that?"

"Where were you Brian?" Guthrie asks again. I can hear the worry sound in his voice.

"Oh you know, here and there," he says laughing a little bit. "I kinda had a date."

"What does that mean?" I ask. "Are you drunk?"

"Adam's mad at you." Guthrie says. "He's mad 'cause you didn't do your chores."

"Oh that's right! I forgot about that," Brian says.

"Don't worry about it. I did 'em for you," Guthrie says smiling at Brian.

"Alright lil partner! Thanks a lot." Brian says and he's really happy.

I look at Guthrie and he's really happy too. That makes me feel better.

"Get outa here little sis. I wanna go to sleep," Brian says.

"Can't I sleep down here with you guys?"

"Not enough room. Scram," he says.

I get out of their bed and say happily, "I'm glad you're not lying dead somewhere in a ditch."

Brian groans and throws his pillow at me.

"Thanks," I say giggling, and I take his pillow and sneak back up to my room. I'm glad he's home safe.

* * *

After breakfast Guthrie and I help wash the dishes. It's not our favorite thing to do on a Saturday morning so we complain.

"It won't kill you," Hannah says. "I do them the rest of the week."

Adam walks in and asks, "have any of you guys seen Brian?"

"Maybe he's out in the barn," Hannah says.

"No, I checked. He's supposed to be out there cleaning the tack room. It's a mess."

"Maybe he went into town with Crane," Hannah says.

"Maybe he's lying in a ditch somewhere," I say laughing. Everyone laughs except Guthrie.

"Quit saying that!" Guthrie yells.

"Geez! It was just a joke! He's probably out on a date again," I say smiling.

"Maybe he's letting this superstar stuff go to his head," Adam says. "Which reminds me, I don't wanna catch you doing his work for him anymore, short stuff." He flicks Guthrie with a towel and I laugh. Guthrie glares at me so I stop.

"You're just picking on him 'cause he's the star and he's better than you!" Guthrie says meanly. I look at Adam to see if he's mad. He is.

"I don't care what kind of a hot shot he is, ranch work comes first!" He yells.

"Honey, calm down," Hannah says. "He'll show up."

Adam calms down. "Yeah, I guess I'm just a little bit nervous about the game. You know I think the whole town's betting on us," he says smiling at me and Guthrie. I smile back, but Guthrie still looks mad at Adam.

"I've never even heard of mountain polo before I came up here," Hannah says.

"It's pretty important around here," Adam tells her.

"Yeah, it's like the Super Bowl!" I chime in.

"Yep, lots of folks treat it like it's the Super Bowl of Carbon County. You know, if we lose we might have to think of some reason to spend time in the high country," Adam jokes.

"Can we?" I ask excitedly. "We could go camping. It would be so much fun!"

Adam and Hannah laugh. "Oh I bet you'd love to go," Adam says. "You'd get a few days off school. Let's just see how this game goes, ok twerp?"

Adam, Hannah and I laugh, but Guthrie's still glaring towards Adam.

* * *

"Why are you so mad at Adam?" I ask Guthrie as we walk towards the river.

"Because he's mad at Brian for no reason."

"Well he didn't do his chores yesterday. Adam would get mad at us if we didn't do ours," I remind him.

"But I did them for him so that shouldn't matter. He's just jealous of Brian!"

We reach the river and sit and start throwing rocks at a target. It's a small part of a rock sticking up out of the water in the middle of the river. We sit quietly now.

"We'd better get back," Guthrie says. "We have to leave for practice soon."

"We just got here! Besides, I don't want to go. Practice is so boring. Do you want to stay here and pretend we got lost?" I ask.

"No, Brian's gonna be at practice and I want to watch him play." He gets up.

"I'm not going back. Just tell Hannah I went out to the pond and I'll be back later."

"That's a dumb plan Heidi. She's gonna be mad at you and I'm gonna be mad at you too if I have to wait back at the house with her." He starts walking back and then he stops and turns around and says, "I'm gonna tell on you too."

"What!" We never tell on each other. "If you tell on me I'll never talk to you again! Ever!"

"Big deal. I'll just talk to Brian then," he says walking off.

"Hey, you're supposed to wait for me!" I yell.

"Well I'm not going to!" He's not stopping.

Fine! I'll just stay here. I don't care about Guthrie and his stupid Brian! But, I know I'd better go back so I wait for Guthrie to get farther away, and then I head back to the house slowly. All the way back I think about how mad I am at Guthrie.


	3. Chapter 3

"Come on Heidi! We've been waiting for you for a long time!" Guthrie yells at me. He's waiting at the jeep with Hannah. Everyone else has left already.

I run over and ask Hannah, "do I have to go? Can't I just stay home? Pleeeeeese?" I look up at her and give her my biggest smile.

"Come on, get in. You know you have to go," she says.

That smile thing never works on Hannah. I climb in the jeep and sit in the backseat and we head out to the polo field, which is also used as the towns soccer field and football field.

When we get there everyone is standing around which is weird because they should be practicing. Guthrie runs over to them.

"What're you guys waiting for? Where's Brian?" He asks.

"Good question," Adam says. "Alright guys let's get started. Maybe he'll show up in a little bit." They all put their helmets on and get up on their horses.

Guthrie turns around and walks over to us on the sidelines. He looks sad.

"Come on Guthrie, lets go play," I say to him. I'm still mad at him but I'm also super bored.

"No, I'm gonna wait here for Brian."

I sit down on the ground, put my elbows on my knees and rest my chin in my hands. "You're no fun anymore Guthrie! Ever since they started wining all their games all you wanna do is watch Brian play. And he's not even here right now. It's boring!"

"You don't have to sit here," Guthrie says.

We hear a truck pulling up and I look over and see Brian get out.

"He's here!" Guthrie yells. He jumps up and smiles and waves to Brian.

I keep watching the truck because two girls are getting out too. They look pretty. They go stand in front of the truck to watch practice. I can hear Adam yelling at Brian.

"It's about time you showed up! Where've you been?"

"Relax," Brian says laughing. "I got a few plays I want to show you. Go sit out Ford and let me show you how it's done." He gets on his horse and waves over to the girls. I'm gonna go talk to them.

"Let's run play six!" Adam yells to everyone and they start practicing. Guthrie's yelling out to Brian and cheering him on. I walk over to the girls.

They see me coming and smile at me. "Hi," I say smiling my best smile. "Who are you guys?" I ask.

One of the girls looks down at me and smiles, "aw, what a cute little girl you are." And she pats the top of my head. I don't like her. I look at the other girl and she says, "what's your name little girl?" I don't like her either. I don't like it when people call me little.

"First of all, I'm not little!" I stomp my foot. "Second of all my name's Heidi, and Brian's my brother and you guys made him late to practice. So, who are you?" I glare at them.

They stop smiling and the girl with the blonde hair says, "why don't you run along and play now little girl. We're here to watch Brian." They look over to the field because there's a lot of yelling going on. I run back to Guthrie on the sidelines and see Evan laying on the ground.

"What happened?" I ask. Hannah's running out to Evan.

"Evan got in Brian's way, so he got knocked off his horse." I listen to all the yelling.

"Hey!" Adam yells at Brian. "That was Evan's shot!"

"Take it easy!" Brian says laughing a little. "I saw a shot and had to go for it."

"We're here to practice! You start fooling around like that and someone's gonna get hurt!"

Brian looks mad. "Who do you think you are? Vince Lombardi?"

I don't know who that is but I bet he's someone important.

Adam yells back at him, "I think you'd better sit out for a while until you can learn the plays."

I don't think Brian likes that because he storms off the field and gets in the truck with the girls and they drive off. Everyone stares over there and then Adam sighs and says, "let's get back to practice." And they get back to it.

"Guthrie I don't think Evan got in Brian's way. I think Brian got in Evan's way."

"Shut up Heidi!" He storms off to the other side of the field. There's some stairs over there that go down to a stream. I think he's mad.

"Do you wanna play now?" I yell over to him. He ignores me so I follow him. I catch up to him just as he gets to the stairs. I pull his arm so he faces me and he yanks it away and turns towards the stairs but I can see he's crying. "What's wrong?" I ask.

"Nothing! Just leave me alone!" He runs down the stairs and I follow him but I'm getting mad too.

"Hey! I had to come to this stupid practice because you didn't want to stay home with me! And now Brian's not even here!"

"It's not my fault you can't stay home by yourself!" Then he turns around and yells, "'little' sister!"

That does it! He knows I hate being called little! I'm hurt that he called me that but I'm also really mad about it. "I'm sick of people calling me little today!" I jump on his back and try to pull him down to the ground. We play wrestle sometimes and sometimes we wrestle for real. I even hit Guthrie once, but usually we don't fight with each other. But not today. I'm mad I had to come and I'm mad Guthrie wouldn't play with me and I'm mad he's mad at me. So I try to wrestle him down.

"Get off of me!" He pushes me off but I keep trying to wrestle. He spins around, puts his hands on my shoulders and pushes me to the ground. That makes me madder. I get up and rush at him. "Leave me alone, Heidi! I'm trying not to hurt you! But I will if you don't leave me alone." He's holding me back. "I may not be able to hit you but I'll kick you! I swear!"

"I don't care! I'll punch you right in the face if you do that!" I yell while still trying to pull him down and he kicks me.

"Ow!" That hurt. "You asked for it!" I try to punch his face but he blocks me so I kick him back. He kicks me again but this time he kicks a rock up and it hits me on the leg. He pushes me down on the ground and walks away. I pick up a rock and throw it at him and it hits him in the back.

"You're lucky that didn't hit me in the head!" He yells turning around and looking at me. I pick up another rock. "If you throw that at me, I'll tell on you!" He yells like he's daring me. I'm still sitting on the ground so I take aim and throw it at him. I miss and he shakes his head and runs away from me along the path by the stream.

I sit there and throw a few rocks at the stream and cry. I don't like it when Guthrie and I fight. But I'm still mad at him. I pick up a few more rocks and think about following him but I decide not to. I get up and put the rocks in my pockets in case I need them for later, and walk over to the stairs. I stand there for a while and think about what I should do next. I guess I'll go watch practice. I walk up the stairs and over to the field.

I cross through the middle of the field because my brothers aren't playing right now. Instead they're sitting on their horses talking about plays or something like that. I can hear a little of what they're saying as I walk by but mostly I'm just thinking about my fight with Guthrie. I wipe the tears off my cheeks as I pass by but I stop when I hear laughing. I look over at them and Evan's looking at me.

"What happened to you? You look like you've been rolling around in the dirt!" He says laughing. Ford's laughing too.

I glare at Evan and yell, "you'd better shut up or I'll throw a rock at you too!"

He laughs. "That's real funny Heidi!"

I stop walking and take one of the rocks out of my pocket and throw it as hard as I can at him. It hits him right on his helmet.

I wish I hadn't done that. He looks mad. "Why'd you do that?" He yells. It looks like he's getting off his horse so I take the other rock out of my pocket and put my hands on my hips.

"If you come near me I'll throw this one at you too!" And I hold it up. Yep, he's getting off. He's yelling something as he's coming towards me but I can't hear him. I can't hear anything because I'm so mad. I throw the rock and miss. Uh oh! I'd better run! But Evan stops and turns around to go back to his horse. I look around and everyone's staring at me and I hear Adam yelling my name.

"What!" I yell. "I hate this game! I hate being here! I hate Guthrie and I hate all of you!"

"Get over there on the sideline and sit your butt down and don't move!" Adam yells at me.

I glare at him and slowly walk backwards towards the sideline.

"You'd better move a lot faster than that, girl!" He yells.

I scream at him and turn around and walk over. I sit down as far away from Hannah as I can and put my face in my hands and cry. This is the worst day ever!


	4. Chapter 4

I'm sitting on the sidelines pulling at the grass. Practice must be over because it looks like they're packing things up. Crane rides over to me.

"Where's Guthrie?"

"Over there," I say pointing across the field towards the stairs.

"Go get him. We're packing up and going home now."

I just sit there and go back to pulling at the grass.

"Go get him," he says again.

I look up at him and say, "I can't. I'm supposed to sit here and not move. Remember?"

"Still having your little tantrum?" He asks. I look down at the ground and shrug my shoulders and he says, "fine, I'll go get him." And he rides off.

I pick at the grass and wait until it's time to go. I can see Guthrie walking across the field. I'm still mad at him. Adam and Crane have already left in the jeep and Daniel yells over to me to come get in the truck. Hmm. I have a choice now. I can either get up and go, or sit here. I'm still mad so I choose to sit here.

"Get over here," Daniel yells.

"Can't! I'm not supposed to move," I yell smiling at him.

"Quit being a brat! If you don't come now we're leaving and you can walk home!"

"I'm not supposed to walk home by myself so who's gonna stay and walk home with me?" I ask still smiling. I'm liking this game. Daniel's walking over to me.

"You give me no choice," he says sighing and smiling at me. He reaches down and lifts me up and throws me over his shoulder.

"Put me down!" I scream. I hit at his back as he walks to the truck and puts me in the back. Everyone's staring at me. Guthrie, Evan and Ford are in the back. Daniel gets in the front with Hannah and drives us home.

I glare at Guthrie and he glares back at me. I look at Ford and Evan and they're smiling at me.

"Quit looking at me or I'll throw a rock at you!" I yell.

They laugh. "Ooo we're scared." So I kick them.

"Quit being a brat Heidi," Ford says.

"Leave me alone," I say and I look out at the road.

* * *

When we get home I jump out of the truck and head over to the barn.

"Hold it right there missy," Hannah calls over to me. I stop and turn around. Go park yourself on the porch steps over there. You too Guthrie." We both groan but do it. "I don't know what's going on with you two today but I think you need to sit here for a while and figure it out. I'm going to go inside and get started on dinner. I'll expect you to come inside as soon as you figure it out. And I expect that to be soon. Understand?"

I nod my head and Guthrie says, "yes ma'am."

"Good!" She smiles at us and goes inside.

* * *

We sit there on the steps quietly. I look over at Guthrie and he looks sad. It's hard to be mad at him. I know he's really upset about Brian.

"Guthrie? I'm sorry I got mad at you." He doesn't say anything. "I'm really sorry. Are you worried about Brian?"

He nods his head. "I wonder where he went. He was so mad. Adam and Crane went to go look for him."

"That's good. I bet they'll find him and bring him home. Adam will probably say he's sorry for yelling at him too," I say.

"Do you think so? Adam was really mad at him."

"Yeah. Guthrie, Brian's gonna be ok. He'll be home for dinner. You'll see." I scoot next to him and put my arm around his shoulders.

He looks at me. "Thanks Heidi. I'm sorry I kicked you."

"It's ok. I'm sorry I threw a rock at you."

He looks at me and smiles, "did you really throw a rock at Evan?"

"Yeah. I wish I didn't now, but I was so mad and he was laughing at me."

"You're just like Brian," Guthrie says laughing.

"I know. Everyone keeps telling me that." I laugh too.

"C'mon, we'd better go help with dinner," Guthrie says. We stand up and hug each other and then we go inside to help.

* * *

"Guthrie they're back!" I yell, running into the kitchen. Adam and Crane follow me in.

"Where's Brian?" Guthrie asks.

Adam sighs. "Well, I might as well tell you all now. Brian's off the team."

Everyone is shocked. "What? For good?" Daniel asks.

"That's up to him," Adam says. "Crane and I found him in town and we tried to talk to him but he didn't want to listen to us."

"Maybe it's 'cause you were yelling at him!" Guthrie yells.

"Yeah!" I chime in.

Everyone starts yelling. "We're never gonna win without him!"

"Listen!" Adam yells. "He's not doing us any good. He's late, he misses practice, he hogs the ball and he's treating this whole thing like a joke."

Guthrie's mad and yells, "but he's the star!"

"No he's not!" Crane yells. "We work as a team."

"Ok, but he's the best we've got," Evan says. "You can't just kick him off the team."

"I'll let him back on as soon as he shows me he can be a responsible team member." Adam says.

Everyone starts yelling again until Hannah tells us all to stop.

"Look, Adam's just doing what's best for the family," she says and her and Adam leave the kitchen and go out the back door to the porch.

We all look at Crane and yell at him.

"What are you yelling at me for? It's not my fault Brian is being such a jerk," he says.

"Well you're agreeing with Adam," Daniel says.

I look over at Guthrie and he looks really mad. "What are you thinking about?" I whisper to him.

"I'm thinking about how mean Adam is," he says staring at the back door. "And I'm thinking about how mean Hannah and Crane are for taking his side!"

"Guthrie you're scaring me. You look madder than I've ever seen you. You look a little like Brian when he gets mad."

"I'm just thinking about how unfair it is that Adam gets to kick Brian off the team!" He whispers back. "I'm gonna be on Brian's side. He shouldn't be kicked off the team just because Adam says so."

"Ok. I'll be on your side too," I whisper.

* * *

Dinner that night is crazy. Brian's still not home yet and everyone's still mad. There's lots of yelling and arguing. Mostly from Daniel, Evan, Ford, Guthrie and me. It seems like Adam, Hannah and Crane are all on the same side and are against us.

"Brian's probably mad at you so he's not gonna come home!" Guthrie yells.

"He can come home whenever he wants and he knows it," Adam says.

"He's probably really mad and hates you right now!" Guthrie yells. I look at Guthrie because I think I know what he's gonna say next. "I hate you!" He yells. I was right. I look at Adam to see what he does. He looks over at Hannah and she puts her hand on his arm. Guthrie's crying now.

I stand up and yell, "I hate you too! Look what you're doing to Guthrie!" I go over to Guthrie and hug him.

"Come on guys," Crane says calmly. "Let's just stop yelling. Brian will be home soon and I'm sure he'll want to be back on the team and we can all get back to getting along with each other."

"We'll see," Evan says getting up. Daniel and Ford follow him out to the living room. They look mad.

"Hey! Who's gonna help with these dishes?" Adam calls out.

"I'm sure you guys wouldn't mind helping me," Hannah says looking at me and Guthrie.

I look at her and think for a minute. "No, I think you, Crane and Adam should do them tonight." I guess I said something wrong because they're looking at me really mad. Even Hannah is. I pull Guthrie's arm and try to get him to walk with me to the back door. "I'm gonna take Guthrie out to the porch so we can talk now," I say. And I nudge Guthrie hoping he'll get up and follow me.

"Guthrie's fine right where he is. But I think you and I will go out to the porch and talk," Adam says glaring at me.

"No that's ok," I say looking at him and backing up towards the sink. "I think I'll help with the dishes now."

"Out!" He yells pointing to the back door.

* * *

I sit on a chair by the back door listening to what's going on inside.

"Come on Guthrie, why don't you come help me with the dishes," Crane says. I peak through the window and I can see Guthrie get up from the table and walk over to the sink with Crane.

"I'll help you in a minute," Hannah tells them as she walks over to Adam. He's pacing over by the table. She smiles at him and gets him to stop pacing and they're facing each other. "Calm down. She's just upset because Guthrie's upset."

"I know. But sometimes she's just so frustrating! That little tantrum she had today? What was that all about? I mean, she's out there throwing rocks at people!"

Hannah smiles and says, "I know, she's not perfect. You have to remember though, she's only ten. She's still just a little girl."

"Yeah, a little girl who says things without thinking, does things without thinking and she's stubborn as heck! She's just like a miniature Brian!"

"But she's also sweet and loving and you have to admit she says and does some of the funniest things sometimes." Hannah says.

Adam looks at Hannah and shakes his head, "she's just this little ball of energy that explodes sometimes!"

"I know, I know. Just like a little firecracker," Hannah says. "And you boys all love her to death. Firecracker and all!"

"Boys are so much easier to raise than girls," Adam says sighing. "I wonder if this is how mom and dad felt when Brian was little. 'Cause I swear she's just like him!"

Hannah laughs. "I'm sure it doesn't help that she's got you and her brothers all wrapped around her little finger."

Adam laughs too. "She sure does doesn't she." I wonder what that means. I think it sounds like a good thing, but I'll have to ask somebody later. "Why does she have to be so darn cute! I'm mad at her but I know all she has to do is look up at me with those big blue eyes, or start crying and I can't be mad at her anymore."

Hannah hugs Adam and says, "I think this has to do with Guthrie and Brian. Everybody's mad about this Brian stuff right now. You talk to her, I'll talk to Guthrie and when Brian gets home I'm sure he'll be ready to join the team and this tantrum stuff will be over."

"I hope you're right. 'Cause this is one dad, slash brother, who's really frustrated with his family right now." And he gives Hannah a kiss. Right on the lips! Yuck! Now he's coming to the door, so I quickly get up and go sit on the top porch step.

I sit on the step and stare straight ahead into the darkness. Adam sits on the step and stares straight ahead too.

"So what happened out there today at practice?" He asks me.

"Guthrie and I had a fight."

"A fight, huh?" He looks at me. "Did you throw a rock at him too?"

"Yes," I say and I look at him. "He kind of kicked one at me first."

"You know you keep talking about how you're not a _little_ girl anymore, but throwing rocks at people is exactly what a _little_ girl would do."

"Sorry."

"And why were you so rude to Hannah when she asked for your help with the dishes?"

"What do you mean? I wasn't rude."

"Yes you were. You said me, Crane and Hannah should do the dishes instead of you guys helping. That was rude."

"I didn't mean it like that. I just meant you guys should do it 'cause you're are on the same side and the rest of us are on a different side."

"What?" He looks at me like he has no idea what I'm talking about.

I stand up and walk down a few steps so I can stand in front of him and we can see eye to eye. "You see, it's like we're in a war."

"A war?" He looks at me with a little smile.

"Yeah, a war. You, Hannah, and Crane, you three are on one side. And me, Daniel, Evan, Ford and Guthrie, us...four,"

"Five," he corrects me.

"Us five are on the other side. So we can't help Hannah with the dishes 'cause you're like the enemies."

We're both quiet for a minute and it looks like Adam's thinking about something. Then he says, "so if your side can't help our side, and our side can't help your side, then who's going to make your breakfast tomorrow? Crane, Hannah and I will be eating bacon and pancakes and what will you guys have? Oatmeal? And who's going to make your lunch for school?"

I think about that. This war thing doesn't sound like a very good idea anymore. "I guess we shouldn't be in a war. Besides, if we are in a war, I think I want to be on your side."

"Come here." He laughs and pulls me into a hug. "You've got some crazy ideas in that head of yours sometimes." He rubs his knuckles on the top of my head. Then he holds me out in front of him so we're looking eye to eye again. "We're not at war with each other Heidi. We're not enemies and there are no sides. We're just having a little disagreement and that happens in families sometimes."

"Ok." I smile at him. "What does it mean to be wrapped around somebody's finger?"

"What? Were you listening to us in the kitchen?"

I laugh. "Maybe. What does it mean?"

He laughs too. "Nothing that a _little_ girl needs to know."

"Hey!" I say laughing and putting my hands on my hips.

"Why don't we both go in and help Hannah with the dishes," he says getting up.

"Okay." And I run into the kitchen to help.

* * *

After we're done doing the dishes Guthrie and I go sit on the couch. Guthrie still looks sad.

"I wonder when Brian's coming home," he says.

"Do you want to play a game or something while we wait for him?" I ask.

"No."

I don't like it when Guthrie's sad. We both sit there and listen to Daniel, Evan and Ford talk about Brian being kicked off the team. They're still mad. The phone rings and Adam answers it. We all try to listen but we don't know what he's talking about. When he hangs up the phone we can tell he looks mad and frustrated.

"Brian's in jail!" He says throwing his hands up in the air.

"What?" Everyone is shocked. Hannah walks over to Adam and puts her hand on his arm.

"Yep, he got picked up for drunk driving."

"Is he ok?" Hannah asks.

Adam looks at her like he's real frustrated and says, "yeah he's fine. He's feeling no pain."

"How's the truck?" Crane asks.

"I'll check it when I get there," Adam says as he puts his jacket on.

"Can I go with you?" Guthrie asks. I look at him and he looks like he's going to cry. I think I want to cry.

"No. One McFadden in jail is plenty." He starts to walk out the door and then he turns around and says to me and Guthrie, "get ready for bed." And then he walks out the front door.


	5. Chapter 5

"Crane, is Brian gonna come home tonight?" I ask while getting into bed.

"Sure, Adam's gonna pay the bail money and bring him home."

"What if he doesn't?"

"He will don't you worry about it." He smiles down at me. "Ok?"

"Ok," I say smiling back. He kisses the top of my head and says goodnight. I close my eyes and pretend to go to sleep while I wait for him to leave and go downstairs.

I get up and peek out my door to see if Hannah's done talking to Guthrie. I watch her kiss him goodnight and then she walks into the kitchen with Crane. I wait for a couple of minutes and then sneak downstairs to where Guthrie's sleeping.

"Hi," I whisper, and lay down on Brian's side of the bed. "Can I wait here with you for when Brian comes home?"

"Yeah, I hope they come home soon."

"Me too." And we lay there waiting.

* * *

I wake up when I hear Adam come home and I hope he doesn't see me down here. It's probably really late but Hannah and Crane are still in the kitchen.

"Where's Brian?" Guthrie whispers to me.

"I don't know. Let's listen."

"Where's Brian?" Hannah asks.

"He wants to stay in jail. Can you believe that?" Guthrie and I look at each other shocked.

"What? Why?" Crane asks.

"He's just being stubborn. He says if he can't play on the team, he doesn't want to come out. I didn't have enough money to bail him out so I told him I'd be back in the morning, but he doesn't want to be bailed out. He's being so pig-headed right now!"

I lean over to Guthrie and I whisper, "I knew he wouldn't bring Brian home tonight! I knew it!"

"I hope he's ok in jail," Guthrie whispers.

"Me too."

Then we hear Hannah say, "I know he says he doesn't want you to bail him out, but I think he'll feel differently in the morning. You've got to go back in the morning and bail him out."

"I know, it's just why did he have to do something so stupid like drink and drive! What kind of example is he setting for Guthrie? Or even Ford or Evan, or any of the kids?"

Guthrie whispers, "why does he want to stay in jail?"

I just shrug my shoulders and we lay there listening until their done talking and they decide to go to bed. I throw the covers over my head so they won't see me down here but I hear Hannah say, "go to your own bed Heidi."

I throw the covers off and sit up. Then Guthrie asks, "why isn't Brian home?"

"Guthrie, go to sleep, Heidi go to your bed. You have school in the morning, " Adam says.

I get up and follow them upstairs and go to my room and get in bed. I lay there thinking about Guthrie. I hope he's ok sleeping down there by himself. And then I wonder what Brian's doing in jail right now and if he's ok.

* * *

For breakfast Hannah's making us pancakes. It's just us kids that have to go to school in the kitchen with Hannah. I think Adam is already in town getting Brian out of jail and Crane's probably working on the ranch somewhere. Ford, Evan, and Daniel are sitting at the table laughing about Brian driving into a haystack.

Guthrie yells, "hey! They don't have any proof. I think they're crazy if they think he was drinking and driving."

Hannah tells Guthrie to come turn the pancakes. I sit and eat listening to them talk about Brian.

Ford says, "how long do you think he'll have to stay in jail?"

"When Tim Carter's brother got busted for drunk driving he spent two weeks in jail," Daniel says.

"Two weeks!" Evan yells. "Oh great! Well there goes the game! He won't be able to play!"

Two weeks! That's a long time! I don't want him to be gone for two weeks.

Guthrie walks over to Daniel and asks, "is that true Daniel? Brian might have to spend some time in jail?" Guthrie's upset.

"I don't know Guthrie it depends on the judge. Drunk driving's really bad." Daniel looks at Guthrie and puts his arm around him. "He'll be alright."

I walk over to Hannah and give her a hug and cry. She hugs me back and says, "come on guys, Adam's going to bail Brian out and then we'll see what happens after that."

"But what if he doesn't?" I ask. "He said he was bringing him home last night and he didn't. I just want Brian to come home."

"We all do sweetie. We all do," she says hugging me tighter and kissing the top of my head.

* * *

At school I can't stop thinking about Brian. It's hard to do my work so I ask my teacher if I can go outside to get a drink and she says yes. I walk out to the drinking fountain and as I'm drinking I hear a familiar voice behind me.

"Hey McFadden!"

Oh god! It's Gary! I hate Gary! He's such a bully. He even picks on girls. I beat him up once. I turn around to see what he wants.

"What?" I ask.

"Your brothers better win that polo game. My older brother bet money on them to win and he'll be mad if they don't!"

"So. Why should I care?"

"Just tell them they better win!"

"Tell them yourself! I'm going back to class!" I try to walk by him but he blocks my way. "Leave me alone!" I yell.

"I'm not touching you!" He says smiling at me.

"You'd better not or I'll beat you up again!"

"You're not supposed to touch me or you'll get suspended again," he says.

He's right. "I'm gonna tell my brothers your bugging me and they'll beat you up!" I yell.

"I'm not scared of Guthrie! And I've got a brother in high school that can help me!"

"Oh yeah? I've got _three_ brothers in high school that can beat your brother up! Oh yeah, I just remembered, they've already beat him up once! So leave me alone!" I push by him and run to my classroom. I'm definitely going to tell my brothers about this when I get home.

* * *

When Guthrie and I get off the bus I can tell Guthrie's happy.

"Come on Heidi, let's run home! Brian should be there!"

"That's right!" I yell. I race home trying to keep up with Guthrie.

* * *

We run through the front door yelling, "we're home! Where's Brian?" We run into the kitchen and Hannah's sitting at the table waiting for us.

"Hi guys," she says. "Why don't you sit down and have some cookies." She always has cookies waiting for us when we get home.

"Where's Brian?" Guthrie asks.

"Sit down and let me explain."

"Explain what? Where is he?" Guthrie sits down and then I do too.

"Brian's still in jail," she starts to say.

"What? Why?" Guthrie yells.

I look at Hannah and she looks sad. "Did the judge make him stay in jail?" I ask.

"No. Adam went to get Brian, but Brian didn't want to come home."

"That's a lie!" He yells. "Brian would never want to stay in jail! Adam must've made him stay there!"

"No Guthrie, Adam would never do that," she tries to tell him more but he runs out the back door yelling, "you're lying! You're lying!"

I look up at Hannah and she smiles at me. "I'm sorry," she says. She stands up and walks over to me and tries to hug me but, I push her away and yell, "I knew Adam wouldn't bring him home! I knew it!" And then I run out the back door to find Guthrie.

* * *

I'm really sad. Why would Adam leave Brian in jail? Why would Brian not want to come home? This doesn't make any sense to me. I follow Guthrie over to the barn. He's crying and I'm crying too.

"Why is Adam being so mean?" He asks.

"I don't know. Why doesn't Brian want to come home?"

"He probably does but Adam won't let him."

Guthrie and I sit on a bale of hay for a while and eventually stop crying. Then we just sit there quietly. After a while Guthrie starts to talk.

"We need to come up with a plan," he says.

"A plan for what?" I ask.

"A plan to break Brian out of jail."

I look at him. "What? How are we gonna do that?"

"C'mon, think Heidi. How can we get him out?"

"We could get some dynamite and blow the jail open so he could walk out," I say.

"That's a dumb plan! Where are we going to get dynamite?"

"We could dig a big hole outside the jail and dig a tunnel to the inside and he could crawl out."

"That's a dumb plan too."

We sit and think some more and then Guthrie says, "I got it! We're gonna pull the bars off his cell and he can walk out that way!"

"Yes!" I like this plan. "But how? We can't just pull the bars out with our hands."

"I know. What if we tied ropes around the bars and then used our horses to pull the ropes?"

"Yeah! Horses are really strong. They could pull the bars out. But how are we going to get our horses to the jail? It's not like we could just ride them into town for no reason." Some people ride their horses to town. Not a lot of people, but some.

"We'll tell Hannah we have to bring them to a 4-H meeting at school," Guthrie says.

"But everyone knows we don't like 4-H. They won't believe us."

"Hannah doesn't know that yet. We'll wait 'till everyone goes to polo practice and then tell Hannah about the meeting."

"Ok." This sounds like a great plan to me.

We work on our chores and watch as our brothers get home from school and start their chores. And when we're done with ours we go up to the loft and wait.


	6. Chapter 6

Everyone is outside now packing up their stuff for practice. Guthrie and I are watching from the loft and when everyone's ready to go Hannah calls up to us.

"Let's go you two."

"We'll be down in a minute," I yell down.

We wait until our brothers have left and Hannah is the only one left waiting. Then we climb down the ladder to go talk to her. Guthrie whispers to me, "let me do the talking." I nod my head.

"Hannah, we forgot there's a 4-H meeting today at school. Can we go?" Guthrie asks.

"4-H? I didn't know you guys were in 4-H. Hop in the jeep and I'll drive you there."

"Actually Hannah, we're supposed to bring our horses to the meeting. So we were wondering if we could ride them to school."

She looks at me and then back at Guthrie. "Why do you guys need to bring your horses to the meeting?" She gives us a little smile. "You're not trying to trick me are you?"

I look at Guthrie and wonder what he's gonna say.

"No Hannah, we're not trying to trick you. Our leader said she wants us to bring them so she can show us the correct way to groom them. And then she wants us to practice showing them. Can we ride them there? Please?"

"I don't know. Have you ever ridden into town before?"

"Oh yeah, lots of times," Guthrie says.

"You have?" She asks. She looks like she's not sure about this. And Guthrie's not completely lying. We have ridden our horses into town before. Just not by ourselves. "Adam lets you ride them there all by yourselves?"

"Yes," Guthrie says.

Hannah looks at me and I nod my head.

"You're being awfully quiet Heidi. Why?" She asks.

"I don't know," I tell her.

"Well if Adam lets you, then I guess it's ok with me. But you better not be lying to me." She looks at us carefully.

"Oh we're not!" Guthrie says excitedly.

"Ok then, I trust you. I'm going to go out to the polo field now." We wave bye and she drives off.

"Guthrie, don't you feel bad about lying?" I ask.

"Maybe. But just think about how happy everyone will be when we bring Brian back home."

I think about that and wonder if this is a dumb plan. Usually I come up with the dumb plans. My brothers always joke about my plans. Mostly 'cause they never work. Well this is Guthrie's plan, and he usually goes along with my plans, so I'll go along with his. Besides, everyone _will_ be happy when they see we brought Brian home. Hannah won't be mad at us then.

* * *

When we get to the jail we ride our horses around back. Behind the jail is a small field. It's kind of like a small backyard. Also on the back side of the jail are the prison cells with bars. It's a very old jail so the bars look like they're from the olden days.

"Ok, let's tie our ropes around the bars," Guthrie says.

We get off our horses and walk up to the building. There are four cells with bars. Two on the top story and two on the bottom. We walk over to the bottom one on the right and tie our ropes on. Guthrie makes sure my rope is really tight like his. Then we get back on our horses and hold the other end of our ropes tight.

"Ok," Guthrie says, "hold on tight and on the count of three we'll ride as fast as we can and the bars will come right out."

"Ok," I say. "I'm ready." I hold on to the rope real tight and when Guthrie says three I ride Lucy as fast as I can. But all of a sudden, I feel a hard jerk and I'm falling off Lucy and lying on the ground. I look over at Guthrie and the same thing happened to him. We're both on the ground.

"Are you ok?" Guthrie asks.

"Yeah. How about you?"

He nods and we look back at the bars. They're still attached to the building. It didn't work.

"The bars must be too strong for the horses, so the rope pulled us off instead!" We hear laughing and we look up to the bars on the second story. It's Brian!

"You got the wrong cell!" He whispers pretty loudly so we can hear him. He's still laughing. I guess we should've seen what cell Brian was in first. Then we hear Brian say quietly, "get outta here before someone catches you! Hurry up!" We run over to the bars and untie our ropes. "Hurry!" He says. When we get our ropes I look up at Brian and he's smiling down at us. I wave to him and he waves back, and then we get on our horses and sneak out.

* * *

It feels like a long ride home. Guthrie's not saying much and I don't feel like talking much either.

"I thought that was the perfect plan," Guthrie finally says.

"Me too!" I tell him.

"Now we've got nothing! No Brian, and Hannah's gonna be mad at us!"

"Maybe she won't be mad. Maybe we'll get home before everyone else does. Nobody would know we were gone, just Hannah would know. Then we just have to make sure she doesn't tell anyone we were gone."

"Maybe that would work. But what if everyone's home before us?"

"We'll say we're sorry and tell her we're just really sad about Brian being in jail and we wanted to visit him. How could she be mad after we tell her that?" I ask. "We should cry too. Maybe she'll be sad and not mad if we cry."

"Ok, I sure hope we get home first. Come on! Let's ride as fat as we can!" And we take off towards home.

* * *

When we get home we can see we're the first ones there.

"Alright!" Guthrie says. "Now we just have to make sure no one knows we were gone and Hannah doesn't tell them. We need to talk to her before she talks to anyone else."

We put our saddles away and go sit on the porch steps waiting for Hannah to come home.

* * *

We haven't been home long when we see everyone drive up. Please let Hannah come over here by herself, I think. She does! My brothers start putting things away in the barn and Hannah comes walking over to us at the house. Guthrie nudges me and says, "let me do the talking."

"Hi Hannah!" Guthrie says. "How was practice?"

"Good! How was your class?" She asks.

"Oh it was real good, we learned a lot!" He says.

"Yeah, we learned a lot!" I chime in. Guthrie glares at me.

"Why don't you two come help me make dinner. We've got some hungry boys over there!"

We laugh and walk into the house with her. When we get into the kitchen Guthrie and I look at each other and smile. We know what each other is thinking. It worked!

* * *

At dinner everyone is talking about practice. It sounds like Ford didn't have the greatest practice but he's getting the hang of it. "I wish Brian was here!" Ford yells.

"I know!" Evan says.

"Hey, we're not going to get into this arguing match tonight. We had a good practice and that's it," Adam says. There's a little bit of grumbling but no one talks about Brian anymore. Then Adam looks down at me and Guthrie. "So how come you two weren't at practice today?" He asks.

I put my fork down and look at Guthrie. Now what? I know I'm not supposed to talk so I just stare at him.

"Oh, they rode their horses into town for the 4-H meeting," Hannah says.

"What!" There's lots of laughing. I look around and see all my brothers laughing except for Adam. He's glaring at us.

"Why is that so funny?" Hannah asks.

"Because they hate 4-H!" Ford says. And they're all still laughing.

"Why?" Hannah asks.

"Let me tell the story," Daniel says. "Heidi's never been in 4-H, but Guthrie's first year in it Heidi helped him with his project. So Guthrie decides his project is going to be raising a cow." Everyone is still laughing. "So he picks one of our calves to raise. He has to take care of this calf all year until he's almost a year and the size of an adult cow. And then he has to show him at the fair."

"Well that sounds like a nice project. But what's so funny about that?" Hannah asks.

"Oh it gets better," Crane says laughing. I glare at him.

"So Guthrie and Heidi raise this little calf...what was his name?" Daniel asks.

"Tony?" Ford says.

"No I think it was Terry," Evan says.

"It was Toby!" I yell standing up. I look and Hannah and yell, "and we took care of him all year and showed him at the fair and got first place and then at the end of the fair they auctioned him off so someone could cut him up and eat him!"

"That's awful!" Hannah says. "You boys should be ashamed of yourselves for laughing about that!"

My brothers are still laughing. "That's what you do in 4-H when you raise animals. Besides, we live on a ranch!" Daniel says. "What do you think happens to our animals?"

"I don't think about that!" I yell.

"I think Heidi and Guthrie cried for a whole week! The said they never wanted to do 4-H again. Not even the projects that don't involve animals," Evan says laughing.

"All right! That's enough!" Adam yells. Then he says to Hannah, "Guthrie and Heidi don't like 4-H and would never go to it. My guess is they made up that lie to do something else in town."

I sit down and look at Guthrie.

Hannah looks at me and says, "is that true?" I look up at her and she looks a little sad. I feel bad so I go back to staring at Guthrie.

"Yes," Guthrie says looking at her. "We're sorry."

I nod my head.

"What about riding your horses into town by yourselves? Was that a lie too?" She asks.

"Yes," Guthrie says.

"Why would you tell a lie like that?" Adam asks.

"Let me guess," Evan says. "This was one of your brilliant plans Heidi?" They all laugh.

"It was Guthrie's plan!" I yell.

"What were you two doing in town and what did you need your horses for?" Adam yells. He looks mad.

I look at Guthrie and he stands up and yells, "we miss Brian! We wanted to go visit him!" And everybody shuts up as Guthrie runs out the back door and I follow him.


	7. Chapter 7

"What do you want to do Guthrie?" I ask. We're sitting on a bale of hay over by the barn. It's really dark outside.

"I don't know," he says sadly.

"I'm sorry your plan didn't work."

"Me too. I really thought it would work. If Brian just came home everything would get back to normal. It's just Adam! Why can't he just let Brian be back on the team?"

"I don't know." I look over at the house and see someone coming towards us. When they get closer I can see it's Crane.

"Adam wants you guys to come inside now. It's getting late," he says.

"I don't care what Adam wants!' Guthrie yells. "He's mean! I'm not going in to talk to him!"

Crane looks at me and says, "Heidi, why don't you go in and tell Adam I'm out here with Guthrie."

"No way! Are you crazy? I'm not going in there and getting yelled at all by myself! I'll wait for Guthrie," I say.

"Go! Now!" Crane yells.

"Geez, why are you yelling at me?" I ask. Crane hardly ever yells at me.

"I don't know Heidi, I'm sorry. Would you just go in the house please so I can talk to Guthrie?"

I sigh, "ok." I get up and slowly walk over to the house.

* * *

"What were you guys thinking?" Adam yells at me. I'm sitting on the couch in the living room and he's standing up looking right at me. He looks really tall and really mad. I don't see anyone else around.

"Where is everyone?" I ask.

"What?" He asks.

"Where is everyone?" I say again. "Is Hannah upstairs?"

"Quit trying to change the subject!" He yells. "You guys should never have ridden the horses into town! What if something spooked Lucy while you were riding her on the road? You know you're not...,"

And he just yells on and on and my brain is getting tired of listening. I wonder if he's gonna yell at Guthrie too. I wonder where everyone else is. I know where Crane and Guthrie are. I bet Daniel's in town and Ford and Evan probably went with him. Maybe Hannah went too.

"Answer me!" I hear Adam yell. "Do you?"

Do I what? Oh man I have no idea what he's talking about. I look up at him and think very carefully. Maybe if I don't say anything he'll ask the question again.

"Oh my gosh!" He yells and sits down on the coffee table in front of me. "You're not even listening to me are you?" He looks right into my eyes.

"Yes I am."

"Then what did I say?"

"You said...," I pause for a while, while we look at each other, "do you...?" And I kind of hope he'll finish my sentence.

He sighs. "Why don't you just go to bed," he says quietly.

"Why? It's still early!" This isn't fair. "I'll listen to you now, I promise! What about Guthrie?" I ask. "Does he have to go to bed too?"

"Don't worry about Guthrie. I'm telling 'you' to go to bed," he says while standing up. "I'll deal with Guthrie later."

"Guthrie's right! You are mean! Your the meanest brother of all!" I yell and then I start crying.

"Just go to bed and close your door. I don't want to hear your tantrum."

I feel so angry! I just want to jump up off the couch and hit him!

"I know that look in your eyes," Adam says quietly. "Don't even think about it."

So I get up off the couch and scream the loudest girl scream I can and run over to the stairs. I stomp up them and stomp to my bedroom, and scream as loud as I can, "I hate you!" Then I slam my door shut. I walk over to my dresser and get my pajamas out and put them on. Then I sit on the floor and cry.

* * *

When I wake up it's still nighttime. My door is open and I'm in bed under the covers. I look at my clock. 2:30. I sit up and think about what happened before I went to bed. Then I remember, I acted like a brat. Someone must have come into my room and put me in bed, but I don't remember who.

I'm not tired and I'm kind of scared because every one else is asleep. I look out my bedroom door and it's dark out there. Then I remember that I forgot to tell Daniel about that bully, Gary, at school. Mornings are always crazy in our house, especially mornings when there's school. So I should tell him now.

I get out of bed and look out into the hallway. It's so dark! Ok, if I just run fast I'll be at his room soon. I run down the hall really fast trying not to make too much noise, and I open the door and run to Daniel's bed.

"Daniel!" I whisper and shake him. "Daniel!"

He groans and says, "leave me alone!"

"Daniel wake up!" I shake him hard and he sits up fast and bumps his head on the top bunk above him.

"Ow!" He yells. "What's wrong Heidi?"

Then Crane turns the lamp on next to his bed. "What's going on?" And then Ford and Evan are awake.

"Heidi what are you doing in here?" Daniel asks.

"Daniel I have to tell you something."

"Oh my god Heidi! Go to bed!" Evan yells.

Daniel looks at me and says, "what?"

"What's wrong?" Crane asks. "Are you scared?"

"No. I mean yes. Daniel that bully at school, Gary, is bothering me again."

Daniel sighs and says, "ok, we'll take care of it. Now go back to bed and let us sleep." He lays back down and closes his eyes.

"Yeah, we'll take care of it," Evan says.

"How?" I ask.

There's lots of groans. "Heidi it's two in the morning! Go back to bed!"

"What's going on in here? Why are you guys making so much noise? People are trying to sleep!" I look over at the door and I see Adam standing in the doorway.

"It's Heidi!" Evan says.

Adam looks at me and asks, "why are you in here?"

"I had to tell Daniel something."

"At two in the morning?" He asks. I nod my head.

"Adam get her out of here!" Ford yells. I hear everyone else groan and Evan says, "Crane turn the light off!"

"Come on," Adam says motioning me over to the door.

"Ok," I turn back to Daniel and say, "but Daniel, don't forget."

"I won't. Now let me go back to sleep," he says.

I walk out to the hall and down to my room. I get in bed and Adam stands in my doorway. "Go to sleep," he says and yawns. "And stay in your bed."

"I'm not tired and I'm scared."

"Scared of what?" He asks sitting down on my bed.

"The dark."

"Your light's on."

"It's dark out 'there'," I say, pointing out to the hallway.

He sighs. "So what was so important that you had to wake your brothers up?"

"That bully, Gary, is bugging me at school again."

"And why are you telling Daniel that instead of me?"

"'Cause Daniel can take care of it easier."

"Hmm. I don't think I want to know what that means."

"You probably don't," I say smiling up at him.

"Alright go to sleep now." He stands up to leave.

"I'm not tired at all," I tell him.

"I am, so go to sleep. Why don't you read a book."

"You could read it to me," I say smiling up at him. "Pleeeeese?"

"You really aren't tired are you?" I shake my head no and he gets up and finds a book. I scoot over so he can sit next to me and he sits down and hands me the book. "Why don't you read it to me," he says. And he lays down next to me and I snuggle up to him and open the book.

* * *

At school when I'm out on the playground I see Gary walking over to me. Oh great! Maybe Daniel forgot what I told him last night, or maybe he didn't get a chance to take care of Gary yet.

"Hey McFadden!" I ignore him and start walking away. But he follows me. "Hey! I'm talking to you!" Just keep walking, I tell myself. "I hear your brother's in jail!" I stop walking and he catches up to me. "How does it feel to have a convict for a brother!" He laughs and I turn around and punch him as hard as I can.


	8. Chapter 8

I'm sitting on the bench outside the principal's office. He's been trying to call home all day but no one's answering. Yeah, I get to get out of class _and_ I won't be in trouble at home. I look at the clock and see school's almost over. The principal calls me into his office.

"No one is home Heidi. I'm going to send you out to the bus now and I'll try calling later tonight."

I walk out to the bus thinking about how I'd better make sure someone besides Adam, Hannah, or Crane answers the phone tonight. Maybe Daniel can answer it and pretend to be Adam.

* * *

On the bus ride home I try to think of things to say to Adam so I won't get in trouble. When the bus gets to our stop I haven't thought of anything good to say yet. I get off and look around for Guthrie but he's not on the bus. That's weird. Maybe he had to stay after school. I start to walk home and all of a sudden Guthrie walks out from behind a tree.

"What are you doing?" I ask. "How come you weren't on the bus?"

"I left school early to go visit Brian."

"What? You can do that?"

"Yeah. Daniel said if you tell your teacher you're sick she'll let you go home."

"But won't the school call home?"

"No, because you weren't marked absent."

"Oh. So you went to visit him in jail?"

"Yeah."

"You should of told me. I would've gone too. How was he?"

"He was good. I asked him when he was coming home and he said that was between him and Adam. Then he asked what everybody thought about him getting kicked off the team, and I told him me, you, Daniel, Evan and Ford were on his side. He seemed to like that."

"If you go visit him again I want to go with you. Promise me you'll take me?"

"Ok, I promise." He says as we reach the house and walk up the porch steps.

* * *

Guthrie and I are out at the barn doing our chores when the others get home from school. I told Guthrie what happened at school and he agreed I should talk to Daniel. When I see Daniel I run over to the fence and call him over.

"Daniel, I gotta tell you something."

"What?" He asks walking over to me.

"That bully, Gary, picked on me again today. I punched him and got sent to the principal's office."

"Heidi, you weren't supposed to do that! I told you I'd fix it. You're not supposed to get suspended again!"

"I know, but he was being so mean. The principal tried calling home all day, but no one was home to answer the phone. Adam doesn't know I got suspended yet, and the principal's going to call later tonight. What do I do? Can you pretend to be Adam?"

"No, that doesn't work anymore. Your principal recognizes my voice now."

"Then how am I going to stop Adam from finding out?"

"The only thing you can do is pick up the phone right away when it rings, and then hang it up right away. But that's only going to help for tonight. He's gonna find out sometime Heidi."

"I haven't thought of anything to say yet so I won't get in trouble. I need more time, so he can't find out tonight."

"Ok, if that's what you want. I'll tell Evan and Ford about the plan, and you tell Guthrie."

"Ok." I run back into the barn to tell Guthrie.

* * *

When we're done with our chores Guthrie and I go up to the loft so he can tell me more about his visit with Brian. But we get interrupted when we hear our brothers arguing. They're right below the loft window and they're supposed to be cleaning out the stables, but it looks like they're taking a break instead. We can hear everything they're saying.

"Maybe Adam will change his mind," Ford says.

Evan laughs and says, "you know Adam, once he decides on something he'll stick to it!"

"How could he do this to us?" Daniel asks. "Without Brian we don't have a chance to win."

"I know," Evan says. "And the whole town is depending on us!"

"Come on guys," Crane says. "Adam did exactly what he had to do. Brian has been impossible lately. You were there at practice. You saw how he was acting."

Then Daniel says, "ok, so that means we don't even have a say in it? Brian's being a little stubborn, but that doesn't mean Adam ought to leave him in jail."

Crane is really mad now and yells, "he gave him a choice! Adam went down there with the bail money and everything! What else do you want?"

Evan says, "look, all I know is, if Adam doesn't let Brian play were gonna get killed!"

"That's not the point!" Crane yells. "We're not going to let Brian act like that and do nothing about it. Adam is the head of this family. It's his decision and I think we gotta respect that!"

"Yeah but we don't have to like it," Ford says.

"We're stuck with it. Like it or not," Daniel says.

Crane throws his shovel down and walks off towards the house. He's mad.

Guthrie looks at me and says, "Heidi, we gotta pick sides. Crane and Hannah are on Adam's side. The rest are on Brian's side. I'm gonna be on Brian's side."

"Me too! This means war!" I yell.

"And Heidi?"

"What?"

"We gotta try to break Brian out of jail again!"

* * *

After we're done in the barn we go inside the house. I hope the principal hasn't called yet. Everyone's busy doing their homework. I've been pretty lucky so far that when the phone has rang one of my brothers has answered it and hung up. But Adam's not home from town yet so it hasn't really mattered a whole lot.

It's getting late now and it's almost dinnertime, so he should be home soon. We're all in the living room and Hannah keeps bugging me and Guthrie about our homework while Crane and Daniel are working on a song. Adam walks in the front door and Hannah says, "what happened?"

We all look over at Adam and see he has a big red mark on his face that looks a little swollen.

"Oh some people in town seem to disagree with how I run this family," he says.

"You mean somebody punched you?" Guthrie asks.

"Good guess," Adam says smiling at him.

"Did you punch him back?" I ask excitedly.

"No. As soon as he punched me someone held us both back so we couldn't fight."

"So you didn't even get to punch him back?" I ask disappointed. Before he can answer me the phone rings and it kind of startles everybody. I can see Evan by it and I watch him quickly pick up the phone and set it back down again without anyone noticing.

"I think there's something wrong with the phone Adam," Hannah says. "The phone has been ringing all afternoon but it only rings once, and when I answer it nobody's there."

Adam looks around at all of us. "That means someone got in trouble at school today. It's a little trick they do so I won't find out. Anybody want to confess now?" He waits for a minute. When no one says anything he looks over at Evan who's still standing by the phone, "get away from the phone Evan. The next time that phone rings I'm gonna answer it. I don't want anyone else to touch it."

I look at Daniel and he shrugs his shoulders and mouths, "sorry," to me.

Hannah looks at Adam's face again and asks, "does it hurt?"

"Why would someone hit you?" Daniel asks.

"They didn't think I should've kicked Brian off the team."

Guthrie glares at Adam and says, "well maybe they're right!"

"Guthrie!" Hannah yells.

I look at Guthrie and then back at Adam. They both look really angry.

"What'd you mean maybe they're right?" Adam asks.

Guthrie yells back, "well, I don't think Brian did anything wrong and neither does anyone else! You're the only one against him!"

"Guthrie, he did do something wrong!" Adam yells. And then he says to everyone else, "and I'm sorry, but I can't take a vote on something like that."

"Adam, if Brian doesn't play, it kind of affects us all." Daniel says.

Ford says, "you could've asked us first."

Then Crane yells, "wait a minute! Let's get something straight here, Hannah and I agree with Adam, alright?"

Evan yells, "oh, so now you're pulling rank?"

"Yeah! You guys think you can get your way because you're older than us!" Guthrie yells.

Adam yells back, "Guthrie, somebody has to have a final say in these things, and even though it doesn't seem to be extremely popular right now, I have to do what I think is right."

Guthrie says, "I'm on Brian's side and not yours!" And he runs out the back door.

"Yeah!" I yell. I put my hands on my hips. "I'm on Brian's side too, and this means war!" I glare right at Adam.

Adam throws his hands up in the air and yells, "Heidi! This isn't a war!"

I glare at him ready to yell something else, but the phone rings and everyone stares at it. Except for me. I run out the back door to go find Guthrie.

* * *

I find Guthrie at the bottom of the steps.

"Guthrie, let's go sit somewhere else away from the house. I think the principal's on the phone and Adam's talking to him."

He gets up and we walk over to the barn. It's really dark outside so we turn the barn light on and sit down on a bale of hay.

"We should turn the light off so no one knows we're in here," I say.

"No, it's almost dinnertime. If the light's on they'll know we're out here instead of running away. When Adam gets off the phone that's what he's gonna think, that you ran away. I don't want to get in trouble for that."

"Me either," I say. "I'm already getting suspended and I don't want to be in more trouble."

We sit quietly for a minute and then Guthrie says, "Heidi, why do you think Brian got in trouble for drinking beer?"

"I don't know." I think about that for a minute. "It seems like he shouldn't get in trouble for something like that."

"I know. Everybody drinks beer and they don't get in trouble for it. Why did Brian?"

"I guess 'cause he drove and hit a haystack?"

"But what's wrong with hitting a haystack? People drink beer in bars all the time and then drive home. How come they don't get in trouble?"

We sit and think about that for a while and then I think about something else I want to ask Guthrie. "How come Hannah doesn't want us to drink beer until we're eighteen?" I ask. "Before she came Adam and Brian said we only had to wait until we turned fourteen."

"I don't know why she doesn't want us to. Adam and Brian said we could drink when we turned fourteen because that's when our dad let them drink. He let them drink it when mom wasn't around 'cause he said she wouldn't like them drinking so young. But that's why Crane, Daniel, Evan, and Ford got to drink beer when they turned fourteen, because that's what dad would've let them do. And then Hannah came along and she said no."

"That's not fair! Why do we have to wait?" I say. "Especially since our dad would have let us!"

"That's what Evan and Ford told Adam when he made them stop drinking, but Adam said they still had to wait!"

"Why? Why does he get to decide? It's not like he's our dad. He's just our brother!"

"I know! It's like him kicking Brian off the team, he gets to do it 'cause he's the oldest and that's not fair!" Guthrie yells.

"Well, he's not gonna be the boss of me! I say we drink some beer just 'cause he says we can't!"

Guthrie looks at me and says, "yeah! Let's do it tonight! We'll sneak out here later tonight when everyone is asleep."

"Heidi!" I hear Adam yelling my name.

"What should I do Guthrie? Should I hide?"

"No! Remember, he's not the boss of you!"

"That's easy for you to say! You're not the one in trouble!"

"C'mon, remember we're not on his side, we're on Brian's side, so Adam can't tell you what to do."

The door to the barn opens and Adam is standing there. "Guthrie get back to the house, dinner's ready."

Guthrie gets up and runs out of the barn. Adam is standing there glaring at me.

"I'm hungry too," I say looking up at him.

"Too bad!" He yells. "I told you I didn't want you getting suspended again!"

"But Gary was being mean! He was laughing about Brian being in jail and he called Brian a name!"

"I don't care!" I can tell he's gonna start yelling a whole bunch of stuff now, and I know my brain's going to start to tune him out, but he doesn't let me. "Look at me!" He yells. "You're gonna listen to me this time!"

"Why? Why do I have to listen to you? You're not the boss of me! I pick Brian to be the boss of me!"

"It doesn't work that way! And besides, Brian's in jail, he can't be the boss of you!"

"Then I pick Daniel! It can't be Hannah or Crane because we're not on the same side! So I pick Daniel!"

"Oh my god! Will you stop talking about sides! There are no sides!"

Wow, he's really mad. But so I'm I. "Yes there are! So leave me alone!"

He looks at me and says, "Heidi, you'd better get in that house and march right up to your room. Now!"

I get up and run as fast as I can to the house. I run through the front door, into the kitchen, and I sit down at the table to eat.


	9. Chapter 9

"Why are you in such a hurry?" Hannah asks.

Everyone's looking at me sitting here at the table, and I shrug my shoulders. "I don't know. I'm just hungry I guess."

"Where's Adam?"

"He's coming. He's just walking instead of running." I look at Guthrie and I'm a little bit scared, but I'm still really mad. I hear the front door open and then close. I start eating really fast and then I hear Adam yell.

"What are you doing in here!"

I look up at him and say, "I told you, you're not the boss of me!"

He starts to walk around the table towards me, so I get up and walk around the table the other way. I stop when I'm standing behind Guthrie. Guthrie stands up and Adam stops walking. He's stopped right across the table from us.

"You're not the boss of me either!" Guthrie yells.

Adam glares at us and starts walking around the table again, so we move over until we're standing behind Daniel. "Daniel's the boss of me!" I yell. When Adam is close to Hannah she puts her hand on his arm and he stops moving towards us.

"What are you talking about?" Crane asks.

"You're not the boss either! You're on Adam's side," I yell at him. "We're on Daniel's side so we want him to be in charge of us."

"I swear to God I'm gonna...," Adam yells and starts to walk towards us but Hannah stands up and stops him.

Daniel stands up and says, "ok, calm down everyone." And then he says to Adam, "I got this. Let me talk to them." Daniel looks at us and says, "come on, let's go out to the porch." And we follow him out the back door.

* * *

We sit on the porch steps and Daniel asks, "what's going on? Why are you two so mad?"

"We don't want Adam to tell us what to do anymore. We don't like him and we're not on his side!" Guthrie says.

"Yeah! We pick you!" I say.

Daniel smiles at us and shakes his head. "It doesn't work that way."

"Why not? You're eighteen, you're old enough." Guthrie says.

"It's complicated. Adam's in charge and that's just the way it is. He's the boss whether we like it or not. And that's good."

"But you're mad at him too. Why is it good that he's the boss?" I ask.

"He's taken care of us ever since we've been really little. Guthrie, you were only two, and Heidi you were just a baby. Adam and Brian took really good care of us."

"Then why can't Brian be the boss?" I ask.

"Think about it," he pauses for a little bit. "Brian's in jail right now and he gets in fights all the time. He's not as responsible as Adam, and we need someone responsible to be in charge."

"But you're responsible, aren't you?" I ask.

"Sometimes, but not always. Not like Adam is. Besides, I don't want to be in charge. I'm still in high school." He smiles at us. "And I don't want to have to ground you when you do something wrong."

"You wouldn't have too," Guthrie says.

Daniel sighs. "Yes, I would. I'll tell you what Adam always told me when I was little and in trouble, heck, he still tells me this now when I get in trouble. He wants us to grow up right. Just like mom and dad raised him and Brian. To know right from wrong and to be a part of a loving family. Mom and dad loved us all a lot, and when they died Adam wanted us to know that, so he wanted to take care of us. He's the boss and he always will be and be happy about that. He cares about all of us."

"Even Brian?" Guthrie asks.

"Yes even Brian! He wants Brian to be out of jail, but Brian's just being stubborn."

"But that's only because Adam won't let him play on the team," Guthrie says.

"I know you think that, but Brian wasn't acting like a team player, and he's still not."

"What'd you mean?" Guthrie asks.

"Well, we really need Brian here on the ranch to help out, and he's so stubborn about this polo team he's not thinking about how this affects his family. He's not thinking about us."

"I never thought about that," Guthrie says.

"Me either," I say.

"That's why it's good Adam's in charge. So, do you think you could let Adam be in charge of you again, instead of me?" He asks smiling at us.

Guthrie and I look at each other and shrug our shoulders. "I guess," we both say.

"Good. Then let's go inside and see what's for dessert," Daniel says standing up.

"I'm not going back in there," I say.

"Why?" Daniel asks.

"Because Adam's really mad I got suspended, and now he's even more mad because he told me to go to my room and I didn't. I don't want to get yelled at, and I don't want to have to go to my room, and I don't want to have to go to bed early. If I go inside he's just gonna yell at me until my head explodes!"

Daniel and Guthrie laugh and then Daniel says, "you gotta go in sometime." He holds out his hand for me to hold. "Come on." I take it and stand up.

We all three walk back into the kitchen and everyone stops talking and looks at us. As I'm walking over to my chair at the table Adam says calmly, "Heidi, go to your room."

I knew it. I don't even feel like yelling. I just walk quietly out of the kitchen and go up to my room.

* * *

I hate getting sent to my room. There's nothing to do in here. I lay on my bed and think. Why do I always get in trouble? I wish I hadn't hit Gary. I wish I would've just ignored him. I don't even know what the name he called Brian means. And I really wish I had gone to my room the first time instead of going into the kitchen.

I'm in here for a while and I can hear someone walking to my room. It's Adam. I sit up and he sits at the end of the bed. I scoot to the other side so I'm as far away from him as I can possibly get.

"Heidi, you don't have to sit so far away. I'm not going to bite you. I'm not going to yell at you either."

"You're not?"

"No. I think we've had enough yelling for today. Don't you?"

I nod my head. "Are you mad at me?"

"For what? Hitting that boy at school? Getting suspended? Disobeying me earlier tonight when I told you to go to your room?"

That's a lot of things. I start to cry. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry I get so mad sometimes. I'm sorry I got suspended. And I'm sorry I said you're not the boss of me." I cover my face with my hands as I cry.

"Ok," he says, scooting over to me and putting his arms around me in a big hug. I can't stop crying. "Sh." He kisses the top of my head and holds me for a while. Then he says quietly, "what are we going to do with you?"

I wipe my face and look up at him, "huh?"

He smiles down at me and says, "how are we going to get you to stop exploding all the time?"

I shrug my shoulders. "How'd you get Brian to stop?"

Adam laughs. "He hasn't stopped yet!"

I start crying again. "Does that mean I'm gonna keep getting in trouble all the time and you're gonna keep yelling at me."

"No," he says laughing and hugging me tighter. "It just means you have to try harder at not exploding. You have to think more before you do or say stuff."

"Ok. But you've told me that before."

"I know. I'm gonna keep telling you until it sinks into that little head of yours." He rubs his knuckles on the top of my head until I laugh. "Now, you've got to go to bed early tonight because you've got a busy day tomorrow."

"What do you mean? I thought I was suspended?"

"You are. But we can't stay inside to babysit you tomorrow. We've got work to do so you're gonna have to come work with us out on the ranch. That means you've got to get up early."

"Ok."

"So I need you to get ready for bed now and get in bed. Don't get out of bed tonight. Don't go into the boy's room and don't go downstairs where Guthrie is. Ok?"

"What if I get scared?"

"Just yell for help and Hannah or I will come to you."

"What if you don't hear me?"

"We'll hear you. Ok?"

"Ok."

"Alright, get ready for bed and I'll come read a story to you in a little bit." He gets up and walks out to the hallway, but before he can leave I get off my bed and run over to him and give him a big hug.

"I love you," I tell him.

"I love you too," he says hugging me back.

* * *

When I'm done getting ready for bed Guthrie walks by my room and whispers my name. I come to my doorway and he says, "do you still want to drink the beer tonight?"

"No. Adam told me to stay in bed tonight so I'm going to." Guthrie looks disappointed so I say, "but I guess we can tomorrow night." And we both smile at each other.


	10. Chapter 10

I got up real early the next morning. It was so early the sun wasn't even up yet. I worked hard all day around the ranch with Adam and Crane. We only took one break and that was for lunch. When it was three o'clock in the afternoon Adam said I was finished. I was so tired I went into the house and laid on the couch. It wasn't long before I closed my eyes and fell asleep.

I wake up when I hear the telephone ring. I look around the living room and don't see anyone. It keeps ringing and no one answers it, so I get up and answer it.

"Hello?" I say.

"Hello, is Adam there? This is Mrs. Smith, Guthrie's teacher."

"No he's not here."

"Is this Heidi?"

"Yes."

"Can you have Adam call me tonight? It's very important Heidi. Let me give you my number. Do you have a pencil ready?"

"Just a minute." I find a pencil and a piece of paper. I wonder what she wants. "Ok, I'm ready."

"My number is 532-6678. Please have him call me."

"Ok, I'll tell him." We say goodbye and I fold up the paper and put it in my back pocket.

I look around the house to see if anybody's inside. Someone's got to be around somewhere, because they don't leave me home alone anymore. I look out the window and see Hannah and Guthrie over by the barn so I walk out to them.

* * *

"Where is everyone?" I ask when I get there.

"Practice," Guthrie says.

"Did you have a nice nap?" Hannah asks smiling at me. "I was helping Guthrie do your chores."

"Yep, I had a good nap. Thanks for doing my chores," I say smiling at her. "I can finish them now."

"Ok. I'm going to go in and get dinner started." And she walks off towards the house.

When she's gone Guthrie says, "why'd you tell her you'd finish your chores? She would've done them."

"Because I need to tell you something. Your teacher just called and wanted to talk to Adam. Did you get in trouble at school today?"

"No, but I went and visited Brian today after lunch."

"What!" I said. "I wanted to go with you next time!"

"I miss him Heidi. I'm worried about him. And besides, you weren't even at school so you couldn't have come with me."

"Is he still mad at Adam?"

"Yes. He said he's gonna stay in jail until Adam lets him back on the team."

"But that's never gonna happen!" I yell.

"I know! He's gonna be in there forever! We have to try and break him out again."

"Do you want to do that tonight, or drink the beer tonight?"

"I don't know yet. We need to come up with a plan."

"Guthrie? What should I do with this?" I ask as I pull the paper out of my pocket with his teacher's phone number on it. I show it to him.

"I don't know," he says after reading it. "Let's ask Evan or Daniel."

I put the paper back in my pocket and we get back to our chores.

* * *

At dinner everyone is talking about polo practice this afternoon. It sounds like it didn't go so well. Everybody's mad at everyone again. Except for me. I'm just sitting here eating and listening, but I can tell Guthrie's getting mad.

"Why won't you just let Brian back on the team? Then he can come home and you guys can win!" Guthrie yells.

"Not this again Guthrie," Crane says.

"Well are any of you even visiting him?" He asks.

"Guthrie we can't visit him everyday. We've got work to do here and now we have even more work to do because we've gotta do Brian's share. Besides, he can call home. He gets one phone call a day."

That reminds me about the note from Guthrie's teacher. I forgot to ask Daniel what I should do with it. I have to remember to tell him after dinner.

"Well if you got Brian out of jail you wouldn't have to do his work!" Guthrie yells.

"Yeah Adam, this has to stop! Just let him back on the team so he can come back home," Evan yells.

I push my plate out of the way and lay my head on the table. I feel like banging it against the table. It's like this every night! I start to think about Brian. I look at his place at the table and I wonder what he's eating for dinner. I wish he was here. I miss him. My eyes start to water and all can hear is arguing. Even Hannah's arguing. Adam says there's no sides, but there are.

I get up from the table very quietly and walk over to the back door, and out onto the porch. I sit on the steps and listen inside and it's loud. I hear someone come out the door and I turn around to see Guthrie. He comes over and sits next to me.

"It's so loud in there Guthrie!"

"I know."

"Do you think we should break Brian out tonight so everyone will get along again?" I ask.

"I guess we should do it tonight. Daniel's band is practicing somewhere in town, so we could hide in the back of the truck and hitch a ride. I heard him say he was leaving after dinner."

"Won't they notice we're gone? How are we going to sneak out?"

"I don't know. This is too hard." He covers his face with his hands. He's really frustrated. "Let's just sneak out and leave a note on your bed telling them what were doing. Then they won't worry about us when they find out we're gone."

"Ok."

We hear the back door open and we look behind us and see it's Hannah. "What are you two doing out here?"

"It's too loud in there," I say.

She comes out and sits in between us. "It has been pretty loud around here the last couple days hasn't it?"

"Yes. I'm just tired of it tonight Hannah," I say.

"Aww, come here." She puts her arms around both of us.

"Hannah do you think all this yelling would be over if Brian was back home?" Guthrie asks.

"I think so," she says.

Guthrie and I look at each other. That settles it, we're definitely breaking Brian out tonight!

"Why don't you guys come in for dessert," she says.

"No, it's too loud in there. I think we'll just go up to my room for a little while until they're done yelling."

"Okay, but you're missing out on berry pie," she says smiling at us.

We all get up and walk into the kitchen and Guthrie and I go up to my room. We've got a note we need to write.

* * *

I find some paper and a pencil and give it to Guthrie, and we sit down on the floor in my room. Guthrie starts writing.

"Dear everyone,  
Everyone is mad at each other because Brian is in jail.  
Heidi and I are going to break him out of jail.  
Then we can be happy again.  
Love Guthrie and Heidi"

"Ok, we'll leave this on your bed and close your door. Let's go hide in the truck," Guthrie says.

We put the note on my bed and close my door. Then we carefully sneak downstairs and run out the front door. We run over to the truck and Guthrie says, "I'll be right back. I have to get something from the barn."

"Ok, hurry," I say watching him run. When he comes back he has a white cloth tarp and a saw.

"Hurry, get in," he says.

I climb in the truck and Guthrie climbs in and puts the tarp over us. "What's the saw for?" I ask.

"It's a hacksaw. That's how we're gonna get Brian out. We're gonna saw the bars."

We huddle in the back of the truck and sit quietly, waiting for Daniel to come out. When we hear him coming Guthrie says, "sh, be quiet and don't move." Daniel puts his guitar in the truck and gets in and drives to town.


	11. Chapter 11

When Daniel stops the truck and gets out we wait under the drop cloth until we hear him walk away. We peek out from underneath the cloth and make sure the coast is clear. Then we climb out of the truck.

"Where are we?" I ask.

"I don't know yet." Guthrie says. "I think the jail is this way." I follow him as he starts walking down the street.

"What if someone sees us?" I ask.

"It's not that late. We'll just be careful. Look, there's the jail!" He points to a building down the street and we run to it.

When we get there we quietly go to the side of the building and Guthrie says we have to climb to the roof.

"What?" I whisper.

"We have to get up high so we can lower the hacksaw down to Brian."

"Ok, how are we going to get up there."

Guthrie looks around. "We're gonna climb that tree and jump over to the roof." He points to a tree next to the building. We start climbing up the tall tree. It's taller than the jail so we climb up the middle of the tree and then climb our way out to the roof on a branch that almost reaches the roof.

"It's only gonna hold one of us at a time so I'll go first and then you climb over next." I watch him climb out on the branch and jump over to the roof. "Ok, your turn."

I climb out on the branch all the way to the roof and I have to swing from the branch and jump. I land on the roof and slide a little bit but Guthrie holds me. The roof is pretty flat so it'll be easy to walk across. "Ok, now we have to walk quietly."

We walk carefully across the roof until we think we're above Brian's cell. Guthrie looks over the side and whispers, "this is it!"

"Brian!" We whisper. "Brian!"

We see Brian at the window where his bars are. He can't stick his head out but he can look up. "Guthrie? Is that you?" He whispers. "Where are you?"

"We're up here on the roof!" Guthrie says.

"I'm here too!" I say.

"What're you doing up there?"

"We're here to break you out of jail," I say.

Guthrie says, "I gotta hacksaw. I'm gonna pass it down to you. Are you ready?" We hear Brian laugh. Guthrie lowers it down but it won't reach all the way. "Ok, now catch it!" He lets go of the saw and it falls right by Brian and drops to the ground.

"No!" I yell.

"Sh!" Guthrie says.

Brian is laughing. "You guys are nuts!" He whispers up. "You can't break me outa here. Where am I gonna go? You think they don't know where I live?"

Guthrie and I look at each other. We didn't think about that. I start to cry. "Guthrie our plans never work!"

"Sh! We're gonna get caught!"

Then we hear Brian say, "now listen to me, get off that roof and go home, you hear me? Hurry up and be quiet."

"But we miss you Brian," I whisper.

"I miss you too, but someone's coming. Hurry up and get off the roof. Go!"

We walk quietly across the roof and over to the tree. Guthrie jumps across to the tree and it's hard for him to grab the branch but he does. He climbs to the middle of the tree and whispers, "your turn. Jump. You can do it."

"I don't think I can."

"You have too!" He says. But then I hear him say, "wait, Heidi! Someone's coming!" I crouch down as low as I can and stay still.

"What are you two doing here?" I hear someone say. Oh my gosh, I'm so scared! I don't want to go to jail.

"Heidi, it's Evan and Ford!" Guthrie calls over.

Yeah! Now how am I gonna get down? "I need help," I tell Guthrie.

"I can't help," he says. "The branch won't hold us both."

"Stay there," Evan says. He climbs up the middle of the tree after Guthrie climbs down. Evan climbs up to the branch above the one I want and climbs out as far as he can. He reaches his arm out to me and says, "lean over as far as you can." I lean over and grab his hand and he swings me to the branch I want. We both climb down and Ford says, "come on, the jeep's over here." We follow him running as fast as we can.

* * *

We stop to catch our breath at the jeep. "What were you guys thinking?" Evan says while laughing. "Do you know how much trouble you guys would've gotten into if you'd been caught by the sheriff? Or how mad Adam would be?"

"You guys are crazy!" Ford says. "Whose plan was this one?"

Guthrie and I look at each other. "It doesn't matter!" He says. "It didn't work!"

"How'd you guys know we were here?" I ask.

"We saw you sneak out to the truck. Then we found the note in your room," Ford says.

"Does Adam know?" Guthrie asks.

"Are you crazy? Of course not! We told him we were helping you guys out in the barn taking care of the two sick calves." Evan says.

"Do you think he believed you?" I ask.

"He better, 'cause we don't want to get in trouble for this. We came to get you out of trouble and I'm glad we did 'cause I don't know how you were gonna get off that roof Heidi," Evan says.

"Thanks." I say.

"Alright, let's go home. Get in the jeep."

We all pile in and Evan drives home.

* * *

When we get to the driveway Evan turns the lights off on the jeep and drives real slow so it hardly makes a sound. He parks it and when we're out he says, "ok, we're all gonna walk in together and act natural."

We walk over to the house and make lots of noise walking up the front steps. When we open the front door we all laugh acting like something's really funny. Hannah looks up from the book she's reading. She's sitting on the couch next to Adam.

"How were the calves?" She asks.

"Oh great," Guthrie says.

"Yeah, they're great," I say.

"You were out there a long time," Adam says.

"They were having a hard time latching onto the bottle," Ford says.

"It's getting late. Why don't you two go get ready for bed," Adam says.

"Ok!" We say and run up the stairs.

* * *

When I'm all ready for bed I remember the note I have in my pocket. What do I do with it? I forgot to ask Daniel and he's not here now. I'll have to ask Evan. I fold the note up real small so I can hide it in my hand and I walk out of my room and look downstairs. Hannah and Adam are on the couch, Crane's on the other couch with his guitar, and I don't see anybody else. Maybe he's in his room. I walk down the hallway and look in but just Guthrie's in there.

"What do you want?" He asks me.

"Guthrie, I don't know what to do with the note from your teacher. Should I give it to Adam?"

He sits down on the bed and sighs. "I don't know. What did Daniel say to do?"

"I forgot to ask him so I'm looking for Evan so I can ask him. I guess he's downstairs." I leave and walk over to the stairs. I take a deep breath and walk down to the living room.

"What do you need Heidi?" Hannah asks.

"I need to talk to Evan. Do you know where he is?"

"I think he's in the kitchen doing his homework," Crane says.

"What's the matter Heidi? You look a little scared," Hannah asks me.

"Nothing," I say going into the kitchen. "I just need to talk to Evan."

I walk over to where Evan's sitting. Ford's in here to. "Evan, I need your help," I whisper.

"What?" He asks putting his pencil down and looking at me.

"Sh," I whisper. "Guthrie's teacher called today and I answered the phone. She wanted to talk to Adam but you guys were at practice so I took a message. She wanted Adam to call her tonight. I was gonna ask Daniel what to do but I forgot. What should I do?" I show him the note.

"Does she know it was you that answered the phone?" He asks.

"Yes."

Ford sighs and Evan says, "then you have to show him the note now and say you forgot to show it to him earlier."

"Why?"

"Because if Adam doesn't call her, she's gonna call here again. And whenever she does talk to him she's gonna say she called yesterday and left a message with you. Then you'll be in trouble," Evan says.

"Yeah, you have to show him now," Ford says.

"Sorry," Evan says giving me a hug.

"Maybe you could give it to him for me?" I ask.

He laughs. "No, it's in your handwriting. If I give it to him then he'll just wanna know why you didn't give it to him."

"It'll be ok," Ford says. "If you give it to him now he won't yell at you, but if you don't tell him he's gonna yell at you tomorrow."

"Ok." I slowly walk into the living room and stand there. "Adam?"

"What's wrong?" He asks.

I walk over to him and hand him the note and say, "I forgot to give this to you today."

He opens it up and reads it.

"What is it?" Hannah asks.

"Guthrie's teacher called today and I took the message. I forgot to tell Adam," I say.

"Forgot? Or waited until after you talked to Evan?" Adam asks.

I look at the floor and say, "he said if I told you now you wouldn't yell at me." I can hear Crane laugh a little and when I look up Hannah has a little smile on her face.

"Did you hide it so Guthrie wouldn't get in trouble?" He asks.

"Yes," I say quietly, looking right into his eyes.

"Well, I suppose I'll just have to call her tomorrow," he says.

"That's it? You're not gonna yell?" I ask.

"No, I don't yell all the time," he says smiling at me.

"No," Crane says, "just most of the time."

I laugh and so does everyone else. "Now go to bed," Adam says.

"Ok. Goodnight," I say and I run up to my room feeling happy.

* * *

The next morning while Guthrie and I are walking to the bus stop I tell Guthrie I told Adam his teacher called.

"That's ok, he was gonna find out anyway," he says. I'm gonna visit Brian today after lunch. Do you wanna come with me?"

"Yes!" I say.

"Ok, when lunch is over tell your teacher you don't feel good. Tell her you have a stomach ache or something like that. Then when she sends you to the office to call home, don't go to the office. Sneak out to the upper field and cross over it to the bushes on the other side. There's a path behind the bushes. Meet me there."

"Ok."

"Be careful, and don't get caught! If you get caught you'll get in a lot of trouble at school," he says.

"I'll be careful," I tell him and we get on the bus.

* * *

I feel nervous. Lunch is over and I have to tell my teacher I don't feel good. What if she doesn't believe me? I walk up to her and say, "Mrs. Wilson?" I look up at her.

"Yes Heidi?"

"I don't feel good."

"Would you like to go sit in the office for a little bit?"

"I think maybe I better go home instead. I feel really sick."

She looks at me carefully for a minute and says, "why don't you try resting in the office for a little while first, and then if you still don't feel well, we'll call home."

"Ok." I walk out of classroom and think. Now what do I do? Guthrie didn't tell me what to do if she wouldn't let me go home. If I go to the office Guthrie will leave without me. I guess my teacher won't find out if I leave. I'll go meet Guthrie. I look all around me as I make my way to the upper field. I don't want to get caught. When I get behind the bushes Guthrie is waiting for me on the path.


	12. Chapter 12

"What took you so long?" Guthrie asks.

"Nothing, I was just being extra careful so I wouldn't get caught."

We walk along the path for a while and then I can see the path comes out to a street in town. I look around.

"Guthrie, what if someone asks why we aren't in school?"

"We just tell them we're visiting Brian in jail and we're meeting Adam there. They seem to believe that."

We walk along the street and make our way over to the jail. Before we walk in Guthrie says, "let me do the talking." I nod my head.

Guthrie opens the door and we walk inside. The Sheriff is sitting at his desk and when I see him I start to feel nervous. "Hello Guthrie. Are you here to see Brian again today?"

"Yep. I brought Heidi with me this time."

"And you're sure Adam knows you're here?" He looks at us carefully.

"Oh yes, he knows. He said he'd rather have us visiting Brian now, during school, instead of after, because we have lots of chores to do on the ranch after school.

The Sheriff smiles. "Ok. Follow me."

He leads us back to a small room that has a table and some chairs in it, and then he leaves to go get Brian. I look at Guthrie and he looks happy and excited. I feel that way too. I can't wait to see Brian.

The Sheriff opens the door and Brian walks in.

"Brian!" I yell and I run up to him and hug him. He hugs me back and then Guthrie gives him a hug. We all sit down at the table and the Sheriff locks the door.

"Guthrie, what are you doing here? I told you not to come anymore!" He yells and he looks kinda mad. You're supposed to be in school, and now you've got Heidi cutting school?"

"Don't you want to see us?" I ask, looking up at him. I feel like crying because he's mad. My eyes start to water.

"Of course I want to see you." He puts his hand on top of mine and smiles at me. "But Adam's gonna be mad at you, and then at me."

"But we're worried about you," Guthrie says.

"You don't have to worry about me. I'm fine."

"Why didn't you let Adam get you out of here? We miss you," I say.

"Look, this whole thing is just between Adam and me. You got that?" We nod our heads. "How do the rest of the guys feel about me being here? Are they mad at me too?" He asks.

"They're not mad at you. They're on your side," Guthrie says.

"We're having a war!" I tell him.

He laughs and looks at me. "What does that mean?"

"Hannah, Adam and Crane are on one side and everyone else is on your side!" I tell him. That makes him smile.

The Sheriff knocks and unlocks the door. When he opens it he tells us visiting time is over.

Brian gets up and we get up and give him a hug. I start to cry and Brian kneels down and says, "I'll be home before you know it, ok?" I nod my head and hug him one more time. Then he gets up and the Sheriff takes him out.

We wait for the Sheriff to come back and when he does he leads us out to the front office. When we walk out the door I ask Guthrie, "what do we do now?"

"Now we have to get to our bus stop. We have to hide and wait for the bus to drive by, and then walk home like we normally do."

"How do you know all this stuff?"

"Ford, Evan, and Daniel," he says, while shrugging his shoulders. And we start walking.

* * *

We didn't have to wait long for the bus to drive by and we come out from behind the tree and walk home. When we get to our driveway we laugh about how easy it was to get out of school.

"We should do that everyday!" I say.

"We can't. Daniel and Evan said it only works once in a while. They said you can't do it too many days in a row or you'll get caught."

"Do you think that's why your teacher called yesterday?" I ask him.

"Probably. But it was worth it to see Brian."

"I know. It was worth it. I hope my teacher didn't worry too much when I didn't come back to class," I say.

Guthrie stops walking and says, "what do you mean, "when you didn't come back"?"

I stop too. "She told me to go rest in the office for a little while. She said if I didn't feel better after that, 'then' she would send me home."

"Oh my God! You can't just leave school like that! They're gonna be looking for you!" Guthrie yells.

"What'd you mean?" I yell. I'm scared now. "Who's gonna look for me?"

"Well first of all the principal, and then probably some of the teachers and then I don't know what they'll do if they can't find you. They might even think you were kidnapped or something."

"What! Why would they think that?" I'm crying now.

"Ok, stop! Stop crying! We've gotta come up with a plan quickly! We're almost to the house and we don't know if anyone knows yet. Maybe we can hide out in the barn until Daniel, Evan, and Ford come home. They'll know what to do." We run to the barn making sure no one's around.

* * *

We climb the ladder up to the loft and then Guthrie says, "no. This won't work. If they think you're missing we should tell them you're not, so they don't worry." He looks at me. "We have to go see if someone's home."

"I don't want to."

"You have to! They know this is the time we usually come home, so they'll be worried if they don't see us."

"Won't they just think we missed the bus?" I ask.

"I don't know Heidi! Why'd you have to go and screw this up! All you had to do was have your teacher send you home!" He yells at me.

"Please don't be mad at me. I didn't know," I say crying.

Guthrie puts his hands on my shoulders and looks into my eyes and yells, "knock it off! We gotta big problem and I'm gonna need your help!"

But I can't stop crying. "I'll just go to the house. I feel really bad. I didn't mean to get us in trouble."

"Just wait 'till Daniel comes home." I shake my head no, and he sighs. "Ok, let's go to the house." He takes my hand and we walk over to the house.

* * *

I cry the whole way over because I can't stop. Hannah and Adam are standing on the porch and when I see them I run over and hug them. "I'm sorry!" I cry. They hug me back.

"It's ok," Hannah says.

"No, I'm sorry." I look up at them. "I didn't mean to make people think I was kidnapped!"

Hannah laughs. "Kidnapped? Why would we think that?"

"Guthrie said the school would think that."

"Well they didn't think you were kidnapped," Adam says. He kneels down so he can look at me.

"They didn't?" I ask.

"When the principal couldn't find you he called us first, and then he called the Sheriff." Adam says.

"Why'd he call the Sheriff?" Guthrie asks.

"Well, that's who the school calls when a student is missing, or cuts school." Adam's still kneeling in front of us and he looks over at Guthrie when he says that last part. "When they called the Sheriff, he told them you guys were at the jailhouse visiting Brian. Then the Sheriff called us and told us."

"What else did he say?" Guthrie asks.

"He said today was your third day in a row, Guthrie, to visit Brian. Is that true?"

"Yes."

"Why didn't you ask me to take you?" Adam asks.

"'Cause you were mad at him. I didn't think you'd take me."

"So you sneak around behind my back?"

"Sorry," Guthrie says.

"I'm sorry too," I say and I hug him again.

"Come on guys," Hannah says, "why don't we go inside and get some cookies and talk about this in the living room."

That sounds good to me. I wipe my eyes and my cheeks and follow Hannah inside. Crane says hi to us as we walk in and sit on the couch. I feel a little better now. Especially since no one is yelling at me. Adam sits on the couch across from us and we all wait quietly while Hannah brings a plate of cookies out and sets them on the coffee table. She sits next to Adam and Guthrie and I each take a cookie.

"I hear you guys went on a little field trip today," Crane says smiling at us.

"Guthrie how were you able to cut school three days in a row?" Adam asks.

"I just told my teacher I felt sick and she said I could go home. So instead of going to the office to call home, I snuck out of school. That's probably why she called you yesterday."

"And what happened today?" Adam asks. "How'd you get caught?"

I look at Guthrie and he tells the story. "Heidi said she was sick but her teacher told her to go to the office for a few minutes and then come back to class."

"She said if I didn't feel better after that then I could go home," I say.

"Heidi didn't go to the office. She came to meet me out by the field," Guthrie says.

Crane laughs. "The upper field?" And Guthrie nods.

Adam laughs a little too. "Where do you guys come up with these crazy things you do? Are these your famous 'plans'?" Adam asks.

"Guthrie got this one from Daniel and Evan," I tell him. Guthrie nudges me pretty hard and I glare at him. "What was that for?" I ask. He just shakes his head.

"What else have you been learning from your older brothers?" Adam asks.

Crane smiles and says, "yeah, this I'd love to hear."

"Well, they told me how to hang up the phone after it rings once when your teacher calls home," I say. Hannah, Adam and Crane all laugh. "When we...,"

"Heidi!" Guthrie yells, interrupting me.

"What?"

"Don't tell them everything! Daniel, Evan and Ford are gonna be mad at us!" He yells.

They all laugh. "It's ok, Guthrie," Crane says.

They're all laughing still when the front door opens and Daniel, Evan and Ford walk in.

"What's going on?" Daniel asks.

"How come you're all in here and no one's out doing chores?" Ford asks.

"Looks like you've been crying Heidi." Evan says. "What'd you and Guthrie do this time?" He says laughing. I smile and stick my tongue out at him.

"Oh they're just sitting here telling us all the ways you've been teaching them to stay out of trouble," Adam says smiling at them.

Daniel, Evan and Ford glare at us and Daniel says slowly, "what things?"

Guthrie shakes his head and says, "not me! Her!" He points to me.

Crane says, "relax you guys, they're not saying too much." He smiles over at us.

"Well that stunt they pulled last night had nothing to do with us!" Evan says. "They were the ones that tried to break Brian out of jail, not us!"

"Yeah! They were lucky we were there to help them," Ford says.

Guthrie covers his face with his hands and says, "nooooo!"

"What stunt?" Adam asks. And he's not laughing anymore.

"Oh man! Are you kidding me? You didn't tell them about that? Then what have you guys been talking about?" Evan asks.

"Oh let's see," Adam starts, "how about cutting school, hiding notes from teachers, sneaking around behind my back, riding horses into town...,"

"We didn't tell them to do that!" Daniel yells.

"Well you've been telling them to do a lot of other stuff, haven't you?" Adam yells.

"To keep them out of trouble!" Evan yells.

"And look how that turned out!" Adam yells.

I start to cry and Hannah puts her hand on Adam's arm. For some reason that always seems to calm him down. "Let's stop yelling," she says calmly. "Now what happened last night?" She asks.

"We wanted to break Brian out of jail," I say quietly.

"Again?" Hannah asks.

"Yes," Guthrie says. "We thought if we could bring him home everyone would stop yelling and being mad at each other."

"Yeah, we thought the war would stop," I say looking at Adam.

"Heidi," he starts to say, "there is no...," but Hannah stops him.

"So how'd you try to break him out?" She asks.

Guthrie and I don't say anything. We just stare at her. But Evan and Ford have a lot to say.

"Well first of all they hid in the back of the truck and hitched a ride when Daniel went into town."

"What?" Crane says.

"Hey, you've hitched rides before," Evan says. Crane agrees.

"Then they climbed up to the roof of the jailhouse...," Ford says.

"You did what? Do you realize how dangerous that is?" Adam yells. Hannah puts her hand on his arm again and he calms down a little. "How'd you get up there?"

"They climbed a tree," Evan says. "They had to jump from the tree to the roof and Heidi couldn't jump back over to it when she had to get down."

I can tell Adam's getting madder because he starts rubbing his forehead with his hand. Hannah says, "well how were you going to get him out?"

"We brought a hacksaw with us. We tried to lower it down to Brian but he couldn't catch it," Guthrie says.

"Oh my god, that's hilarious!" Daniel says laughing. "How do you guys come up with this stuff?"

"I know," Crane says. "I never would've thought of that."

"We just think them up in our head," I say kind of smiling. But then I stop smiling because Adam's looking mad at me.

"That's the problem!" Adam yells. "You're not thinking! You could've been hurt! There are so many things that could've gone wrong with your 'plan'! And what do you think was going to happen if you did break Brian out. Don't you think the Sheriff would've come looking for him here?"

"We didn't think about that part," Guthrie says.

"Exactly!" Adam yells. And then everyone is quiet.

"Come on guys," Hannah says. "You've got a big game the day after tomorrow. Go practice and get some of this aggression out and then leave it out there on the field."

There's a lot of mumbling and grumbling but everyone agrees and gets up and heads for the door.

"Do Guthrie and I have to go?" I ask.

Adam looks down at me and says, "yes you have to go. Someone's got to keep an eye on you to make sure you don't go sneaking into town on horses, or climbing up rooftops with hacksaws."

"But we wouldn't...," I start to say and Guthrie puts his hand over my mouth and says, "forget about it. We have to go." Then he whispers in my ear, "besides it'll give us time to 'think' about our plan to drink beer." And we walk out to the jeep.


	13. Chapter 13

When we get to the polo field Guthrie and I walk down to the stream. We find a place to sit and start throwing rocks at a tree that's pretty far away.

"Guthrie do you think we'll get in a lot of trouble at school?"

"I don't know. I guess we'll find out tomorrow though. I still can't believe you messed that up."

"I know. That was dumb." I throw a rock and it hits the tree. "Yes!"

"Good job," Guthrie says. We sit quietly for a while and then Guthrie says, "Ok, let's make a plan of how we're going to drink beer."

"Should we still do it?"

"I think so. I still don't know why it's such a big deal to drink and drive," Guthrie says. "Daniel says people are always driving home from the bar drunk and they don't get in trouble."

"Ok, let's think about what could go wrong with this plan. They always say we never think about what would happen when do something, so let's think." I say.

We're quiet for a while. "I can't think of anything Guthrie. It doesn't seem like anything bad could happen with this plan."

"What if we get caught?" He asks. "Would we get in trouble?"

We think for a while and then I say, "how could we get caught if we drink it at night when everyone's sleeping?"

"Right, but pretend we do get caught. Would we get in trouble?"

"Probably? I don't know." I'm not really sure.

"Then why are we drinking it at night after everyone's asleep? Why aren't we just drinking it in front of them?"

"Because they would never let us. We have to drink it at night," I say. "Right?"

"I guess you're right. I don't know, something feels wrong about it."

"But I thought we wanted to drink it because Brian drinks it. He really likes it a lot," I remind him.

"They all like it a lot!" He says laughing.

"Then we should try it to see why. I mean we've tasted it before, but we never got to drink a lot of it before. This way we can see why he likes it so much."

"I think he likes it because it makes him happy. They all get happy when they drink it. Not that they're sad or anything, but it just makes them happier. Evan said it makes him feel like being wild and crazy," Guthrie says.

"Will we feel that way?" I ask.

"I don't know, I guess we'll just have to try it and find out." Guthrie's quiet for a while and then he says, "Heidi, at school they tell us to say no to drugs and no to alcohol. Maybe we shouldn't do it."

"But our dad would've let us drink when we turned fourteen. What about that?" I ask him.

"But we're not fourteen. And you're only ten."

"Well then maybe we shouldn't drink it. I just wanted to know why Brian likes it so much and why he wasn't supposed to drive. Why is Adam so mad at him for drinking and driving? If we drink it maybe we'll know." I think for a little bit. "Do you think Brian would let you drink?"

"Yeah, if Adam and Hannah weren't around."

"Then we should drink it. For Brian," I say.

"Ok, tonight when everyone's asleep, we'll sneak out with our flashlights and a six-pack of beer to the barn, and drink it." Guthrie says.

"Yeah, we'll just drink it really fast and go back inside. No one will ever know," I say. And we go back to throwing rocks at the tree.

* * *

At dinner everyone is talking, I mean yelling, about practice again. It's the same yelling every night. One side wants Brian on the team, the other side wants him off. I don't care what Adam says, it's like a war in here. I'm the only one at the table not yelling. I'm not really listening either. I look around at my brothers and wonder what dinner was like when my mom and dad were alive. Did they yell like this? Then I wonder what dinner was like after they died.

Adam was a senior or just finished being a senior when they died, and Brian was sixteen or seventeen? Oh my gosh! That would be like Daniel being the dad now and Evan would be as old as Brian was. Could Daniel take care of a baby right now? And Crane was Guthrie's age. Wow. So Daniel would be where Adam sits, Evan would be Brian and Guthrie would be Crane. And then there'd be four little kids and a baby! Two, six, seven and eight! That would be crazy! I start laughing as I think about it.

"What's so funny?" Hannah asks, while everyone is still yelling.

"Can you imagine Daniel taking care of a bunch of little kids and a baby!" I laugh.

"What are you talking about?" She asks smiling at me.

"When my mom and dad died, Adam was Daniel's age. Can you imagine Daniel and Evan taking care of a bunch of little kids?" I ask.

"That would be funny," she says laughing. "I wonder how they did it." I watch her look down at Adam and give him a pretty smile. He stops yelling for a second and smiles back at her.

"Do you think my mom and dad would like all this yelling?" I ask her.

"I don't know, I didn't know them. But my guess is they wouldn't."

I start to cry a little, "Hannah, I miss Brian. It's like we're not a whole family right now."

"Come here," she says, and I get up and walk over to her and she hugs me.

"What's wrong Heidi, why are you crying?" Guthrie asks. Everyone else is still yelling.

"I think she's missing Brian a lot right now," Hannah tells him. Guthrie gets up and hugs me too. I hear the yelling getting louder behind me and I turn around to see Daniel get up really fast. His chair falls backwards to the floor as he makes a lunge at Adam, but Evan stops him.

Daniel shakes Evan off and yells, "I'm going into town! Are you boys going with me?" He looks at Evan and Ford when he says that.

They both get up and follow him out of the kitchen, and Adam gets up and yells out to them, "you better make sure you guys are back before curfew!"

"Or what?" Daniel yells back.

"You'd better hope you don't have to find out!"

"Yes sir, DAD!" Daniel yells, and they storm out.

"Damn it!" Adam sits back down and slams his fist on the table.

"You were wrong!" I scream at Adam. "This IS a war! Daniel was probably gonna punch you and that's what wars are, people fighting each other!" Then I cry as Hannah wraps her arms around me.

"I need a beer," Adam says and he gets up and walks over to the refrigerator.

"Get me one while you're at it," Crane says.

Hannah looks at me and Guthrie and says, "why don't you guys go somewhere so us grownups can talk in here." She smiles at us.

"Ok," Guthrie says to her, and then to me he says, "let's go upstairs."

I follow him upstairs and we decide to go into the boy's room. As we're walking up I ask Guthrie, "do you think Adam and Crane are drinking beer right now to make them feel happy?"

"Probably."

* * *

I climb to the top bunk and stretch out. Guthrie's doing the same on the other bunk bed. We lay there staring up at the ceiling.

"Guthrie, do you think we're going to be ok?"

"What'd you mean?"

"Do you think our family will ever be whole again?"

"What do you mean _whole_?"

I think for a minute. "I mean like all together again, with Brian and everyone liking each other. All of us being happy with each other and not yelling at each other all the time. It's like we're broken right now. Who's going to fix us?"

"I don't know," he says. "I miss Brian being here."

"Me too, but what if we're never a whole family again? What if no one can fix us? What if Brian doesn't want to come home? What if Daniel, Evan and Ford want to leave with him?"

"I don't want that to happen Heidi. You're kind of making my scared right now. I never thought about that before. I don't want them to leave us."

"I'm really scared that's going to happen," I tell him.

Guthrie sits up and looks over at me. "Maybe we should go downstairs and talk to Hannah, Adam and Crane about it. You're making me feel really sad right now."

I sit up and look at Guthrie. "Do you think they'd listen to us? We're not exactly on their side. They're probably mad at us." I pause for a minute. "We've yelled at them a lot too. Especially me."

"So have I. But Heidi, Adam's always telling you there are no sides. I don't think he'd be mad. Maybe they would listen."

"I'm really scared for our family right now."

"Well, think about it like this, what do you do when you're scared at night?" He asks me.

"I go to Adam. Or I yell for Adam or Brian if I'm too scared to get out of bed." I'm quiet for a while and I start to cry softly. "I wish I could do that now."

"Do you want to go downstairs?" He asks.

"I think so. But I'm scared to. What if they're mad and they yell at us?"

"I don't think they'll be mad. Come on, I'll show you." He climbs down his bunk bed and walks over to mine. "Come on. Come down."

I climb down and he takes my hand and we walk out of the bedroom. They're not in the kitchen anymore they're in the living room. They look up when they see us standing there. Guthrie tries to pull me towards the stairs but I don't move. I'm too scared to go down there. They have to be mad at us.

"What's wrong?" Hannah asks.

"We're scared," Guthrie says. He pulls at my hand but I don't budge.

"Scared? Scared of what? Come down and tell us," Hannah says.

"She's too scared to. She thinks you're mad at us and you're gonna yell at us. But we really need to talk to you." He pulls at me again. "Come on." I look at him and I shake my head no.

Adam gets up and comes upstairs. When he gets to us he kneels down and looks into my eyes. "What's wrong?"

"Our family's broken and I'm scared. I'm scared it won't be fixed," I say softly and I cry. Guthrie cries a little bit too.

"I'm so sorry," Adam says hugging me and picking me up. He carries me downstairs and Guthrie follows. Guthrie goes over to Crane and sits on the couch with him, and Adam carries me over to the couch Hannah's sitting on, and sits next to her holding me.

"Sometimes I think we forget how little you guys still are. This must be scary for you," Adam says.

"Heidi says we're not a whole family, she says we're broken. She's scared Brian won't want to come home and Daniel, Evan and Ford will want to go with him," Guthrie tells them.

Adam kisses the top of my head and Hannah puts her arms around us. "I'm gonna make sure that doesn't happen," I hear him say.

"Adam, we really miss Brian," Guthrie says.

"I know. We all do."

"Doesn't he miss us?" I ask.

"I know I would," both Hannah and Adam say together.

"Me too," Crane says.

"How about tomorrow after school I take you guys to visit Brian and then I'll talk to Brian and see if we can't sort all this out. How does that sound?"

Guthrie says good and I nod my head. I'm starting to feel better. I always feel safe when I'm scared and Adam hugs me. Guthrie was right, talking to them helped. "Please don't leave," I whisper in Adam's ear and hold on to him tight.

"I'm not going anywhere," Adam whispers back.

I think Guthrie's feeling better too because I hear him laugh and say, "maybe Brian's not coming home because he likes having his own bed!"

Crane, Adam, and Hannah laugh. I smile a little bit. Crane says, "yeah, I think if I shared a bed with you I'd want to stay in jail too!"

Guthrie thinks that's really funny. "At least I don't have to listen to Brian's snoring anymore."

Everyone laughs at that too, even me. "That's true," I say. "He snores a lot!"

"Are you feeling better?" Hannah asks me. She smooths my hair back with her hand.

"Yes," I say smiling.

I sit with Adam and Hannah and listen to my brothers tell stories about Brian to Hannah. They're all funny stories and ones I've heard before. After a while I start to feel tired. I settle in on the couch and listen to everyone talking and laughing and then Crane takes his guitar out and they start singing. They're singing songs I know. Songs that I've heard my brothers sing ever since I was little. The songs remind me of fun times and I feel really happy.

I close my eyes to rest them because they feel tired, and then I hear someone call my name and say time for bed. I open my eyes and see Hannah smiling at me.

"Time for bed," she says.

I yawn and stretch. "Can I sleep on the couch tonight? I'm too tired to go upstairs."

"Sure, I don't see why not." Hannah covers me with a blanket and kisses my forehead. "Goodnight," she says.

"Goodnight," I say, and I close my eyes and drift off to sleep.

* * *

It's dark when I open my eyes, but I hear loud noises. I sit up and it takes me a while to remember I'm on the couch. What is all that noise? I hear people laughing on the front porch and then I hear the front door open. Guthrie must be awake too because he shines his flashlight on the front door and I can see Daniel coming in.

"Hey, quit shining that at my eyes," he says.

"Sh," Evan says laughing. "We're supposed to be quiet."

"Ok _dad_," Daniel jokes.

Ford walks in and turns the light on so they can see, and he hangs the key to the jeep up on the hook by the door.

"Why are you guys laughing so much?" I ask.

"Sh," they all whisper quietly, and laugh.

"You've been drinking!" Guthrie says. "You're being really happy and funny."

"Who us?" Evan laughs. "Come on guys we'd better get to bed before _dad_ wakes up." They all laugh on their way upstairs.

I'm surprised no one else is waking up. By the way they're acting I'm sure they've been drinking. "Guthrie, do you think Evan and Ford were drinking with Daniel?" I ask.

"Evan, definitely. Ford? I don't know. I think Ford drove them home though because he hung the key up."

I listen to them get ready for bed and it's funny. I can hear them bump into things and laugh and try not to make too much noise, but they're not being very good at that. I can hear Crane talking so I know they woke him up.

"You've been drinking? Come on guys it's a school night." I can hear him say.

"Sorry big brother," I hear Daniel say laughing.

They finish getting ready for bed and Guthrie and I start talking. "Where do you think they drank at?" I ask Guthrie.

"I don't know. I know Daniel talks about parties that have beer at them, but those are on the weekends."

"Do you think they went to a bar?" I ask.

"No, you have to be twenty-one to drink in a bar."

"It seemed like they were having a lot of fun. They were really happy."

"I know. Remember how mad they were when they left?" Guthrie says.

"Yeah, they were really mad. And now they're really, really happy. Drinking the beer must have made them happy." I think for a minute. "Guthrie?"

"Yeah?"

"Are you thinking what I'm thinking?" I ask him.

"If you're thinking about drinking some beer, then yes I am!"

"I am!" I say happily.

"Ok, let's wait for them to be quiet and then we'll get some beer and take it out to the barn. I have to get dressed first."

"Ok," I say. "I'm already dressed, but I have to go upstairs and get my shoes and my jacket."

"Be quiet when you go up there. And get your flashlight."

When it's quiet I walk as quiet as I can up the stairs and into my room. I find my things and bring them downstairs.

Guthrie's waiting by the back door with his flashlight and the beer, and when I'm ready we open the door and head out to the barn.


	14. Chapter 14

We walk over to the barn with our flashlights and a six-pack of beer. I feel excited but scared at the same time. When we get to the barn Guthrie opens the door and we go in. Then he closes it behind us.

"Guthrie, should we think about this again before we start drinking?"

"Ok. Then if we get in trouble we can at least say we did think about it, and what would happen afterwards. I think we've thought about this plan at least two times already."

We sit on a bale of hay and balance our flashlights on the ground, so the light shines up and lightens the barn a little. "What would happen if we drank the beer?" I ask.

"We would feel happy like Daniel and Evan were tonight. What could be wrong with that?"

"Isn't drinking the beer wrong in the first place?" I ask.

"Well, I am twelve. That's only two years away from when everybody else got to drink."

"But I'm ten and that's four years away." I think for a minute. "I know, what if I didn't drink as much beer as you? What if I drank two cans and you drank four?"

"Yeah, that would probably work," he says. "But we didn't answer the question you asked first. Is drinking the beer wrong?"

We think about that again. It is isn't it. We know we're not supposed to drink it. But I want to know what it feels like to drink it. "Yes, it's wrong," I say. "But only if we get caught." We look at each other and I can tell Guthrie's having second thoughts. "Come on Guthrie, don't you want to know what it feels like?"

"I guess so."

"Remember what we said earlier, if we drink it really fast, and go back inside, no one will ever know. And we won't get in trouble."

He looks like he wants to do it now. "Ok," he says. "Are you ready?"

"Yes." I feel excited and nervous all at the same time.

He hands me a beer and I open it. I bring it up to my nose and smell it. "Yuck! I don't like the smell."

Guthrie opens his can and smells his too. "Yeah, but you'll get used to it once you start drinking it. That's what Daniel told me at least."

I take a sip. "I don't like the taste either."

"Just plug your nose and drink it really fast," he says.

I try that, but it's too hard to do. I feel like throwing up. "I can't stand the taste." I look over at Guthrie and he's drinking his can. It looks like he doesn't like it either. He looks over at me.

"Just drink it really fast. Like this." He drinks his beer as fast as he can. When he's finished he puts the empty can on the ground.

"Do you feel happy yet?" I ask.

"No, I don't feel any different. I think it takes a while. Or maybe I have to drink more, I don't know. I've never done this before."

I finish the rest of my can slowly. I don't feel any different except my stomach feels a little weird. We both sit quietly until Guthrie says, "I think we're supposed to wait twenty minutes before we drink the next can."

We wait for what we think is twenty minutes. I'm trying really hard to feel something but I don't. After a while I say, "this is it? I don't feel any different. Do you?"

"I don't know. I'm going to drink another one." Guthrie opens another can and drinks it really fast.

I open my other can and start sipping it. I'm starting to feel warm and it feels nice. "Do you feel any different yet?"

"I think so. I feel kind of warm and I feel a little happy. Like silly happy."

I laugh. "I feel warm too." I drink more of my beer.

Guthrie opens a third can. "Just drink the rest of yours really fast Heidi, like this." He brings the can to his mouth and tries to drink it really fast but some of it spills and he laughs.

"I can't. I don't really like the taste." I take a sip. "But you know what? I can't really taste it that much anymore." I decide I'll drink the rest faster but then I start to feel a little dizzy. "Guthrie I feel dizzy."

"Stand up," he says.

I stand up and I can stand pretty well, it just feels funny. I finish the rest of my beer. "Guthrie, you stand up."

He does and starts to fall over a little bit. We both laugh.

"Ok, there's one beer left. Should we share it or should I drink it all?" He asks.

"You drink it all. You're older."

He starts to open the last can and then says, "watch this." He shakes the can really fast and then opens it. It sprays all over us and everything around us. We both start laughing and can't stop. Guthrie looks at me and says, "hey! We're happy!"

I smile at him. "We are!"

"I don't think we should go back to the house yet," Guthrie says. His voice sounds kind of funny. "I think we'd make too much noise and wake everyone up."

"Yeah, I think we should play in here for a while. That would be funner!" I start climbing bales of hay and laugh a lot.

Guthrie drinks the rest of his beer and then we start playing around in the barn. I feel a little funny. It's kind of like I don't know what I'm doing but I do, and I feel more dizzy. I think Guthrie feels a lot dizzy because he keeps needing to hold onto something to help him stand up. We decide to play hide-and-go-seek. It's really fun to play in the barn, especially with just flashlights.

It's really fun to play right now too, because whenever one of us hides we can't stop laughing. We each take a couple turns to hide and now it's Guthrie's turn to hide again. I can hear him try to climb the ladder to the loft. He's laughing and I'm laughing too but something tells me he shouldn't be climbing the ladder. I decide to shine my light on him, and I go over and tell him to get down. "I don't think you should go up there."

He jumps down. "Heidi, why do you think Brian got put in jail for drinking and driving?"

"I don't know."

"You know what we should do?" He asks. "We should drive the jeep to see why."

"You don't know how to drive." I think about that for a minute. "But it would be kind of fun. Hey! We could go visit Brian in jail!"

"Yeah! We could go there and wake him up! Heidi go to the house and get the key to the jeep. I don't think I can walk all the way over there," he says laughing.

I laugh too. "Ok. You just sit right here!" I pull him to a bale of hay and push him down on it. "I'll be back."

"Remember to be quiet," he says loudly and laughs.

"Sh! You too!"

I make my way over to the house. I still feel funny. Kind of like I know what I'm doing but it's like I can't feel anything. I quietly sneak up to the front door and open it. I use my flashlight to find the key hanging on the wall. Once I have it I sneak back outside and walk back to the barn.

Guthrie's not on the bale of hay where I left him. "Guthrie," I call out as loud as I can in a whisper.

"I'm over here."

I shine my flashlight over to his voice and find him sitting on the ground in the chicken coop. "What are you doing in here?" I ask.

He's quiet for a minute and then he says, "I don't remember."

"Ok, I got the key. Let's go to the jeep."

"Help me up Heidi."

I walk over to him and pull him up. "What's the matter with you?"

"I don't know. Everything's just kind of spinning around and I feel sick."

"Do you want to rest for a while?" I ask. I can feel my stomach feels a little sick too.

"No. Help me walk to the jeep."

I help him walk over to it. We laugh quietly while we're walking, but Guthrie's laughing way more than I am. He climbs in and I get in on the other side.

He puts both his hands on the steering wheel and says, "ok. Give me the key." I hand it to him.

"Guthrie are you sure you want to do this?" I ask.

We're sitting in the jeep and Guthrie is putting the key in the ignition. He starts the jeep, looks at me and smiles. "Heidi, this is the best way. Besides, Brian does it. What could go wrong?" He looks back to the front of the jeep. "Crane's been teaching me and I think I can do it. It's just hard to reach the pedals sometimes."

"Ok, but don't drive too fast," I say and I grab on tight to the seat.

"Maybe you should put your seatbelt on," he says laughing as the jeep lurches forward.

"Are you kidding? No way! I wanna be able to jump out if you crash into something." I hold on tighter.

Guthrie can't get the jeep to go anywhere. It just keeps lurching forward and stalling. Finally he gives up.

"I guess we won't be visiting Brian tonight," he says. Then he looks over at me and says, "Heidi I don't feel good."

I look at him and I can tell he doesn't. He gets out of the jeep and kind of falls to the ground. I get out and run over to him. "Are you ok?"

"I think I'm gonna throw up." And he does. Then he starts crying a little and moaning. "I don't feel good."

"Can you get up? I could help you walk to the house and put you on your bed?"

"I don't want to. I just want to lay here and go to sleep."

"You can't! We have to go inside and get back in bed. Please Guthrie, get up!" I shake him and he just groans.

Now what do I do? I don't think I like beer. Why isn't Guthrie acting like Brian or Daniel or Evan? Why is he just laying here? And why is he sick?

"Guthrie get up!" I try pulling him up but he's too heavy. "Guthrie what do I do now? Should I get Hannah? Why aren't you getting up?"

"Leave me alone," he says. He's talking really funny too. His voice sounds weird. It's like he's talking really slowly. "I just want to sleep."

"Guthrie! Guthrie!" I shake him and he just groans. I have to get help.


	15. Chapter 15

I grab my flashlight and run to the house. I run as fast as I can up the porch steps to the front door and open it fast. I don't even shut it behind me. I turn the light on and run upstairs to Adam and Hannah's room. I throw their door open and it slams against the wall.

"Hannah! Hannah! Wake up! Guthrie's sick!" I yell. I run to her side of the bed and shake her. "Hannah wake up!"

"I'm awake!" She sits up and turns her lamp on. "Ok, I'm coming. Let me put my slippers on."

"Hurry!" I yell.

Adam sits up and says, "what's wrong?"

"Guthrie's sick," Hannah says. "I'm going downstairs to check on him."

"Come on, hurry!" I tell her.

"Ok." She says following me downstairs.

When I walk to the front door she stops and says, "why is the door open? Why are you going outside? Where's Guthrie, Heidi?"

"Out here, come on!" I say. I run to her and pull on her arm. "Come on!"

"Adam!" She yells upstairs. "Adam!" I keep pulling at her.

"What?" He yells from upstairs.

"You'd better get down here. Guthrie's outside."

"What?" I hear him yell as I pull Hannah out the front door. And we run outside together.

* * *

She runs with me over to the jeep and I show her where Guthrie is.

"Guthrie!" She says shaking him.

He moans.

"Heidi what happened?"

"He threw up and then he said he was tired and he laid down to go to sleep."

"He smells like beer! Has Guthrie been drinking beer?"

"Yes."

"How much Heidi? How much!" She asks.

"He drank four cans."

"Four cans?"

"Yes."

"Guthrie? Guthrie can you hear me?" She shakes him a little.

"What?" He moans. He opens his eyes and says, "go away...let me sleep."

Hannah sighs and says, "he'll live. He's gonna have one big headache tomorrow."

Adam runs up and says, "what's going on out here? Is Guthrie ok? Why is he outside?"

"He's been drinking beer," Hannah says.

"What!"

"Is he going to be ok?" I ask. I'm starting to cry because I don't understand why Guthrie's so sick.

"Yes, he's going to be fine. He just has to sleep it off," she says.

"Sleep what off?" I ask, but no one answers me.

"Adam, why don't you carry him to the house and we'll put him in his bed."

Adam walks over to Guthrie and picks him up. "What the heck is he doing out here? What we're you guys doing?" I don't say anything, I just keep crying.

All four of us head back to the house but I follow a few steps behind. "Heidi said he drank four beers," Hannah tells Adam.

"What's he doing drinking beer! He knows better than that! You've got a lot of explaining to do!" He yells that last part back at me.

They talk to each other the rest of the way back to the house while I follow behind quietly crying and thinking about what I'm gonna say. I can't believe we're going to get in trouble for this. We had a plan and everything. How come our plans never work.

When we're inside I go sit on the couch and Adam lays Guthrie down on his bed. Hannah takes his shoes off and puts a blanket over him. Then they turn around and look at me.

"Explain to me what happened," Adam says.

"We drank some beer."

"You drank some too?" Hannah asks.

"Yes. I had two cans and Guthrie drank four."

"Why?" Adam asks. He sounds tired.

I shrug my shoulders.

"Uh-uh, you're not gonna shrug your shoulders at me. Why are you outside in the middle of the night drinking beer?"

"To see what it was like."

"That doesn't make any sense. You know you're not supposed to drink it," Adam says.

Nothing makes sense to me now. I wish we'd never done this! "We were trying to find out why Brian likes to drink it and why drinking and driving was bad." I cry.

"How were you going to find out if drinking and driving was bad?" He asks.

"Our plan was to drive the jeep and find out."

"You tried to drive the jeep?" He asks.

"Guthrie did. He doesn't really know how to drive so we didn't go anywhere."

I can tell Adam's getting really frustrated the more I explain stuff, but at least he's not yelling.

"Did you guys _plan_ this?"

I nod my head.

"Did you ever think that if you need to have a _plan_ that maybe it's because you're doing something wrong?" I just stare at him and shake my head. He shakes his head. "Never mind. Why don't we go to bed and sort all this out tomorrow."

"Adam, I'm going to sleep down here with Guthrie," Hannah says.

He gives her a kiss and says, "I swear, first thing tomorrow morning I'm going to that jailhouse and talk to Brian. I'm gonna knock some sense into that stubborn head of his!" Then he looks at me and says, "let's go."

"Can I sleep down here too?" I ask.

"No. Go upstairs."

I run upstairs and Adam walks up behind me. I run into my room and turn my lamp on and slam my door shut. I open my drawer and pull out my pajamas. I start putting them on and I just can't stop crying. Why is Guthrie sick? How come he's acting so weird? Is he going to be ok? And why does my head hurt so much? When I'm dressed I open my door and Adam's waiting outside.

I wipe my tears and get in bed.

"Are you gonna stay in here, or do I have to put a lock on your door?" Adam asks.

I look up at him. "What?" I'm confused, he's gonna put a lock on my door?

He sighs and says, "never mind. Why are you crying?"

"Is Guthrie going to be ok? Why is he so sick?"

"Guthrie's going to be fine. Lay down and go to sleep."

"But why is he sick? Can I sleep downstairs with Hannah and Guthrie?"

"No. I'm really mad at you, Heidi. Stop crying, stay in bed and go to sleep."

He leaves and that makes me cry more. "Please don't go. I'm sorry, please come back." I get up and stand in my doorway. "My head hurts a lot and I don't wanna sleep by myself!" I yell.

I look out my door and Adam walks out of his. He looks frustrated. "Gad dammit, what are you doing Heidi? Be quiet and go to sleep. It's late and you're gonna wake everybody up. Get back in bed."

I sit down on the floor and cry.

"Shut up Heidi!" I hear Evan yell from his room.

"Adam! Make her stop crying!" I think that's Daniel yelling.

Their door opens and Crane walks out.

"What's going on?" He asks.

Adam comes back over to my room and says, "never mind Crane. Go back to bed, I got this."

"Adam, she can sleep down here. It's ok," Hannah calls up.

"No, I'll take care of it." He looks down at me. "Why are you doing this?"

I just keep crying. "My head hurts."

He shakes his head and picks me up and says, "I'm too tired for a melt down tonight." He carries me to my bed and sits on it holding me. "Why does your hair smells like beer? What were you guys doing out there tonight?" And that's all I remember before I close my eyes.

* * *

When I wake up my head hurts a little. I look at my clock. 9:30. I guess I'm not going to school today. I hear Hannah and Crane talking to each other outside my bedroom door.

"I guess Guthrie's not the only one with a hangover this morning," Crane tells Hannah. "It seems Evan and Daniel had a few last night too."

"How'd you find that out?" She asks.

"They were so loud when they came home, it was obvious they'd been drinking. It didn't take Ford too long to fess up this morning either."

"Well, Adam's not too happy this morning. He's already in town visiting Brian in jail. I think he's had enough of this stuff."

I get out of bed and when I stand up my head hurts even more. I groan and lay back down again.

"How are you feeling twerp?" Crane asks. He comes into my room and sits on the bed.

"My head hurts," I tell him.

"It's going to," Hannah says from my doorway. She's not smiling but she doesn't look mad either.

"Where's Guthrie?" I ask.

"He's still in bed," she says. "Come downstairs and eat some breakfast."

"I can't. My head hurts."

"That's what happens sometimes when you drink beer," Crane says messing up my hair with his hand.

I groan and push his hand away. "Nobody told me that."

"There's a lot of things we don't tell you," Hannah says. "Get dressed and come downstairs."

"You'd better take a bath first," Crane says. "What'd you guys do, pour beer on your head?"

I don't answer. I guess the beer got on my hair when Guthrie shook the can and opened it. I can smell it now and it makes me want to throw up.

Crane gets up and walks out closing my door behind him. I have a feeling this isn't gonna be a good day.

* * *

I walk past Guthrie on my way to the kitchen and he's sacked out. He's even snoring a little bit and I laugh.

"What's so funny?" Crane asks when I sit down at the table.

"Guthrie's snoring." I tell him as Hannah hands me a bowl and a cereal box. "When's he gonna wake up?"

"Who knows. He's not gonna feel good when he does," Crane says.

"Why?" I ask pouring cereal into my bowl. Hannah hands me the milk and I pour some on my cereal.

"That's what happens when you drink too much," she says.

"He only drank four."

"We're not going to talk about this now," Hannah says. "Finish your cereal."

"Why can't we talk about it now? I have a lot of questions."

"So do _we_," Hannah says. I don't like the sound in her voice when she says that.

"Did Evan, Ford and Daniel go to school?"

"Yes," Crane says.

"But they drank beer too. How come they're not sick?"

"We're not talking about this now," Hannah says again. Her and Crane walk over to the back door. I guess they're going outside.

"Where are you going?" I ask.

"Outside to work. Someone's gotta do some work around here," Crane says. "Come help us when you're done eating, we'll be in the barn."

"Is Adam still going to take us to visit Brian today?" I ask as they walk out.

"I doubt it," he says and they close the door behind them.

This _is_ going to be a bad day!

* * *

I'm helping Hannah feed the sick calves when I hear the jeep drive up. I go over to the barn doors and look out. I can see Adam getting out of the jeep and someone's with him. It looks like Brian. It is Brian!

"Brian!" I yell. I run as fast as I can to the jeep. When I get to him I jump up and he catches me in a hug. "You're home!"

"Hi twerp! Did you miss me?" I nod my head and he puts me down. "I'm gonna go take a shower and then I'm going to get something to eat. Jail food doesn't taste very good. Is there something good to eat in the kitchen, Hannah?"

I look behind me and Hannah's standing there.

"Help yourself to anything you want. It's good to have you back Brian," she says smiling.

"It's good to be back," he yells out as he walks over to the house.

"Does this mean he's back on the team?" I ask Adam.

"We'll see. How are you feeling?"

"My head hurts a little."

"Why don't you get back to work so I can talk to Hannah."

"About what?" I ask.

"About grownup stuff. Get back to work," he says.

I walk back to the calves and sit on a bale of hay. I can hear them talking but it's hard to make out what they're saying. I move closer.

"Are you sure that's a good idea?" I hear Hannah ask Adam.

"Brian and I talked about it on the way over and I think it's a good idea," he says to her.

"But their tempers are so much alike. What if they both explode at the same time?"

"That's happened before and they always seem to work it out. Trust me on this," Adam says.

"I trust you _dad_," I can hear a smile in her voice.

"Don't call me dad!" He says and they both laugh.

I peek out and I see them hug and kiss each other. Yuck! But I wonder what they were talking about. I can see Crane walking up to them.

"How'd you get Brian to come home?" He asks.

"I just talked some sense into him. I think he was tired of being in there too, and it wasn't that hard to convince him to come home once I told him what Guthrie and Heidi have been up to."

Crane laughs. "Good, maybe he can talk some sense into them. When are you going to talk to them by the way? Guthrie's awake now and Heidi has _lots_ of questions." They all laugh.

Are they laughing at me? If they are I'm mad at them!

"I'm sure she has lots of questions," Adam says. "But not as many as I have. Brian's going to talk to them first. I think he's gonna start with Heidi and then talk to Guthrie after," Adam says.

"Heidi and Brian _talk_ to each other? I'd love to hear that conversation!" Crane says.

"Let's go over to the house and see how Guthrie's doing," Hannah says.

So that's what they were talking about. Brian's gonna _talk_ to me about last night. That means he's gonna yell at me before Adam yells at me. I hate it when Brian yells at me. Well, if that's their plan then I'll come up with my own plan. He's gonna have to find me first.

I finish feeding the calves and then I start walking out towards the river.


	16. Chapter 16

I've been walking along the river for a while now. I'm going to go as far as I can. I can hear horses nearby so I know someone's coming. I run and hide behind a big rock.

"We can see you! You know you're not supposed to be out here by yourself," Even yells over to me.

I stand up and see Ford's with him. I start walking along the river again.

"Brian's looking for you," Ford says.

"Well I'm right here!" I yell, but I don't stop walking. I can hear them laughing.

"Come on, come back with us. You know he's just gonna be mad if you don't," Ford says.

I ignore them and keep walking.

"Come on Heidi! You're wasting our time. I got other things I need to do besides coming out here looking for you," Evan says.

"Then go do them and leave me alone!" I yell.

I hear Evan tell Ford, "I don't know why they always send us out to get her. She's always in the same place."

"I know. They should come get her," Ford says.

"I can hear you!" I yell.

"Good! Then let's go!" Evan yells. "Don't make me get off Diablo and come get you."

I pick up a rock. "I'm warning you, if you come near me I'll throw this rock at you!"

"What the heck! Not this again! Do you realize how bratty you're being right now?" Evan says.

"Yeah, quit acting like a brat!" Ford yells.

Evan starts to get off Diablo and I throw the rock. It misses and I quickly pick up another one.

"God dammit! Fine, have it your way! Let's go Ford!" He gets back up on Diablo and says, "I'm telling them you threw a rock at me!"

Big deal, I think as they ride off and I start walking along the river again. I wish Guthrie was here.

* * *

I hear Brian riding up but I don't stop walking. Ok, I think, how's this gonna go? Either we're gonna talk first and then yell, or yell first and then talk. I hear him get off his horse and walk behind me so I start walking faster.

"Hey! Stop walking and get over here!"

I guess we're gonna yell first. I walk faster and so does he.

"Hey! I'm talking to you!" I start running and so does he. It doesn't take long before I feel him grab my arm and spin me around. "What'd you think you're doing! I told you to stop!"

"Let go of me!" I scream and try to pull away.

He doesn't let go, but instead grabs each of my arms with his hands and holds me in front of him while he kneels on one knee so we can see eye to eye. We glare at each other and I can tell he's mad, but so am I.

He yells at me. "What do you think you're doing!" He shakes me a little when he says that and I try to get away but he's stronger. I keep struggling for a while and then I get tired and stop. "Are you done?" He asks. We're both glaring at each other and I don't answer his question.

He gets up and moves me over to a rock and pushes me down on it gently so I'm sitting on it, and then lets go of me. He kneels down in front of me again and we're still staring at each other and I think about running but he says, "if you run, you're gonna wish you hadn't!" I keep staring into his eyes wondering what that means. "I mean it!" He yells. And I can see in his eyes he does, so I stay put.

"What are you doing out here by yourself? And what the heck are you thinking, throwing rocks at people?" He yells. I shrug my shoulders at him still glaring. "Not gonna talk?" He asks.

"Why should I?" I yell while picking up a rock.

"Because I'm talking to you, girl! And you're gonna talk back to me!" I smile in my head and wonder if he just heard what he said and how funny that sounded, but we're in no mood to joke. "And you're gonna put that fricken rock down right now!"

We're in a stare down now. I'm squeezing the rock in my hand really tight. And he says, "look Heidi, you and me, we can stare at each other like this all day, so why don't you..."

I bring my arm up and start to throw the rock, but he's fast. He grabs my fist before the rock can come out and it hurts, but I don't say anything. We just keep staring and he's still holding my hand until I finally say, "you're hurting my hand, let go!"

He stops holding my hand so tightly but doesn't let go. "Are you gonna put the rock down?" I stare at him and shrug my shoulders. He tightens his grip on my hand. "I said," and he talks slower and his voice sounds deeper, "are you gonna put the rock down?" He looks really, really mad.

My eyes start to water and I nod my head. "I'm sorry."

He lets go and I put the rock down.

We stare at each other but my eyes are crying and his aren't. "That crying stuff may work on Adam, but it doesn't work on me!" I can see he looks mad but I also see his eyes start to soften just a little bit. "You and Guthrie did a stupid thing and you're lucky you didn't get hurt. What were you guys thinking?" He yells. "You know you're not supposed to drink beer!"

I can't stop crying. And he just keeps glaring at me.

"We drank it because you drink it. We wanted to know what it was like," I say. "I'm sorry," I cry.

"I'm an adult! You're just a little kid! And you knew drinking it was wrong!"

"You knew drinking and driving was wrong!" I yell.

He's quiet for a little while and says, "Heidi, I did a stupid thing when I drove home that night. You're right, I shouldn't have done it."

"But why? Why was it wrong that you drank and drive? Why did you have to go to jail?"

"Because it's against the law. Bad things happen when you drink and drive," he says. He's calmer now so I am too.

"All you did was hit a haystack. What's bad about that?"

"What if I didn't hit that haystack. What if I drove all the way home and pulled into the driveway and you were standing in the middle of it and I ran into you?"

I think about that. "That would be bad."

"Drinking too much can make you do stupid things, Heidi. I should've never been driving that night. I could've hurt someone really bad."

I think about that for a minute. "You could've hurt yourself!" He nods his head. "That would've been awful!" I start crying again.

"Quit crying!" He yells at me. "Stop it!"

"Stop yelling at me! You're scaring me!"

"Good! I want to scare you! I don't ever want you to drink beer again! Not until you're twenty-one! You got that?" He's yelling really loud now. "You got that?" He yells again.

I nod my head and cry. "I'm sorry. I'm really, really sorry."

He stares at me for a long time and I can see the anger leaving his eyes.

"Heidi, I'm sorry." He tries to hug me but I push him away.

"No!" I scream. "You left us! You left me! Adam said you could come home and you didn't want to!" I stand up and scream, "I hate you Brian! I hate you!" I'm so mad I feel like punching him. I stare into his eyes and punch him on his chest. He just stares at me so I punch him again and again and again, it's like my fists are hammers. I keep punching until I get tired and I cry and lean towards him and he hugs me.

"I'm sorry," he says softly. I don't say anything I just keep crying. "I didn't mean to hurt you."

I push him away. "You didn't!" I yell.

He smiles and says, "you could've fooled me."

I hug him and say, "I missed you so much!"

"I missed you too kid," he says while hugging me back and he kisses my forehead.

We stay like that for a while. He holds me while I cry.

"Don't ever do that again," I tell him. "I missed you too much. You broke our family."

"I'm sorry. Adam told me you thought that."

"It's true. We were at war because of you."

"I heard about that too," he says kissing the top of my head.

"Promise me you won't drink and drive again."

"I promise."

We keep hugging and then Brian says, " what'd you say we go home now so I can tell everyone else how sorry I am."

"Ok."

He picks me up and carries me to his horse and puts me on it. Then he climbs on in back of me and we ride home.

* * *

Brian rides us over to the barn and he lets me off so he can put his horse away. I see Evan brushing Diablo. I walk over to him and he sees me coming 'cause he says, "don't even think about coming over here if you have a rock in your hand!"

I keep walking over to him and I get up on a bale of hay so I can stand on it and pet Diablo's head. "I don't have a rock. I'm sorry I threw one at you."

"You should be! You can really hurt someone doing that! What are you, four?"

"No! I'm ten!"

"Well you sure aren't acting like it!"

He's still pretty mad. I don't like it when any of my brothers are mad at me. "I'm really sorry." He doesn't say anything. He just keeps brushing Diablo. "Evan, I'm really sorry. I mean it. I won't ever do that again."

"Do what? Throw rocks? Or throw one at me?"

I think about that for a minute. "I won't ever throw rocks at anyone again, but especially not at you."

"You promise?" He asks. He stops brushing Diablo and is looking at me.

I smile and nod my head. "Yes, I promise."

He smiles back and walks over to me and says, "good, 'cause if you ever do that to me again you'll be sorry!"

"What do you mean?" I ask smiling.

"I'll pick you up and hang you upside down like this!" He picks me up and hangs me upside down and I laugh. "And then I'll shake you like this until all the rocks fall out of your hands and your pockets!" He shakes me upside down and I laugh.

"Ok, ok, stop!" I laugh.

He puts me back down on the bale of hay and says, "I think you'd better get over to the house. I think Adam wants to talk to you."

I stop laughing and groan. "No more talking. I'm all talked out." I pet Diablo. "Evan, did you drink beer last night?"

He's brushing Diablo again. "Yeah, I did. But Heidi, I _never_ drank beer when I was ten."

"Why not?"

"There's a lot you have to learn about drinking and that's stuff you need to talk to Adam about."

"Why? You're my brother too. Why can't I learn it from you?"

Evan sighs, "Heidi I can't teach you all that stuff. Heck, 'I'm' grounded for drinking beer last night, I'm not a good example for you."

"Evan why do you guys get to drink when you're eighteen, but Brian said I have to wait 'till I'm twenty-one?"

He looks at me and smiles, "probably because you're a girl!" Then he laughs.

"Hey! That's not fair!"

"Don't tell me, tell them," he says and he points over to the house. "And you'd better get over there soon 'cause I know Adam wants to talk to you."

I jump off the hay and walk over to the house as slow as I can.

* * *

I wonder where Guthrie is. I haven't seen or talked to him all day. I don't want to go inside yet, so I sit on the bottom porch step. I look for a stick, or a rock, or something to play with, but I don't see anything. There's paint peeling on the stairs so I start picking at that. I hear the front door open and I don't have to turn around to know who it is.

"What are you doing out here?" Adam asks.

I shrug my shoulders. "Where's Guthrie?"

"He's inside talking to Brian." He comes and sits down next to me. "We need to talk."

I sigh and pick at the peeling paint. "Why? Brian already talked to me. I'm not gonna drink beer until I'm twenty-one."

Adam laughs. "That's not what I want to talk about."

I look over at him, "then what do you want to talk about?"

"Why did you want to drink beer in the first place?"

I start to cry. "Why do we have to keep talking about this? I feel like my head's going to explode! Brian talked to me, you want to talk to me, you're probably gonna want to talk to me and Guthrie together too, aren't you? I'm tired. I'm tired of talking. I'm sorry I drank the beer and I'll never do it again." I put my head down and cry. "Now can you please just go away?"

I probably shouldn't have said that last part. Adam hasn't said anything yet. I peek over at him and he's looking at me and I can't tell if he's mad. So I wipe my eyes and my cheeks and look at him.

"I'm sorry for telling you to go away. I'm just tired of everybody wanting to talk. I'm only ten and you talk to me like you talk to Evan or Daniel or Ford. I'm not as big as them and sometimes when you talk to me I don't understand everything so it's hard to listen." I keep looking at him and he doesn't look mad. He looks like he's listening to me and thinking. So I keep talking.

"I missed Brian so much, and I know I got in trouble a lot this week, but I'm just so tired of talking and yelling and crying. I want things to be normal again. I want you to win the polo game tomorrow, and then I just want things to go back to normal. I want to play, I want to go adventuring with Guthrie, I want to ride Lucy. I don't want to drink beer, I don't want to break my brother out of jail, or cut school. I just want to be a little girl again."

He's looking straight ahead now and I can't tell if he's mad or not, because he just doesn't say anything. Then he looks at me and says, "you're right." He stands up and says, "follow me." And he walks towards the barn.

* * *

When we get to the barn Adam yells over to Evan and says, "Evan, get Diablo saddled up." And then he looks at me and points to a bale of hay ands says, "sit here." He walks into the barn where Evan is and brings out a saddle too. This is strange. I watch them come out and put saddles on their horses and then they go back into the barn. I sit here and wait and when they come back out I see they're holding polo sticks and helmets. Adam walks over to me and hands me a helmet, "put this on." They put theirs on and Evan moves two bales of hay apart to make a goal. Adam brings his horse over to me and gets on. He holds his hand out to me. "Climb on up," he says.

I get up and Evan hands Adam a polo stick and sets the ball on the ground near us. Then Evan gets on Diablo with his polo stick and rides over to the goal.

"Ok, are you ready to play some polo?" Adam asks me.

"Yes!"

"Hold the stick with me like this." He takes my hands and puts them where they're supposed to be and then he holds the stick too. "Swing it back like this, you don't want to hit your horse." It's kind of hard for me because I have to lean over more but Adam helps me. We swing it back together and then swing it forward and hit the ball. It goes forward a little bit.

"Good. Now do it again and this time keep your eye on the ball." We swing the stick together and hit the ball and it goes farther this time. Almost to Evan. Evan hits it back to us.

"Good. Now, if you want to hit it into the goal you swing like this." We take the stick back and he says, "now hit it hard!" And we do. Right into the goal! "Yes!" We yell.

"Great job Heidi!" Evan yells.

Adam teaches me how to hit the ball while riding and we pass it back and forth with Evan. We make a few more goals. "This is so much fun!" I yell. We're all laughing and having fun. I hear cheering and I look over to the fence and Hannah, Brian, Crane, Daniel, and Ford are watching and cheering.

"Look at me!" I yell. "I'm playing mountain polo!"

"Looks like we've got another superstar on our team!" Brian yells over.

We keep playing and I'm laughing and having fun. After a while Adam says, "alright let's take a break, these horses need to rest."

Adam takes his helmet off and slides off the horse. "You're a natural, girl!" He says, looking up at me. I take my helmet off and hand it to him and when he sets it on the ground he holds his hand up to me so I can get down.

"When can I play by myself?" I ask, letting Adam take me off.

He doesn't put me down but holds me and smiles and looks right into my eyes and says, "when you're bigger Heidi." I smile and give him a big hug. "When you're bigger," he whispers, hugging me tight.

He sets me down and I run over to the fence where everyone else is. "Did you see me? Did you see me make that goal?"

They all say yes and give me high-fives and Crane picks me up and swings me around.

"Alright superstar!" Hannah says. "Let's all go in and get some dinner started."

"Ok!" I yell running towards the house. "I can't wait to tell Guthrie!" I feel so happy.


	17. Chapter 17

"Guthrie! Guthrie! Guess what?" I yell running into the house. I run over to the couch where he's laying down. He doesn't look so good. "Are you ok?" I ask.

He sits up a little. "Yeah, I'm ok. My head still hurts a little, but I don't feel sick anymore. Why are you so happy?"

"Adam let me play polo! He taught me how to play!"

Guthrie smiles. "He did?"

"Yeah! He helped me and I made some goals and everything!"

"By yourself?" He asks.

"No, I was on Adam's horse with him. But he helped me hold the stick and swing and everything! It was so much fun! He said I was a natural, and Brian said I was a superstar!"

"Do you think he'll teach me?"

"Probably, when you feel better," I say.

We sit quietly for a minute.

"Heidi, I wish we didn't drink the beer."

"Me too. It tastes bad and it made you sick."

"Hannah said I threw up."

"Yeah, you did. Don't you remember?"

"No."

"Why don't you remember?"

"She said that's what happens sometimes when you drink too much beer."

That doesn't make sense to me. I remember everything that happened, why doesn't he? I don't get to much time to think about that because the front door opens and everyone walks in. They all look happy and that makes me feel happy.

* * *

At dinnertime tonight it's the first time this week there's no yelling at the table.

"I'm so glad you're back Brian," Guthrie says. "Does he get to be on the team again, Adam?"

Everyone is quiet and we all look at Adam. He nods towards Brian. "Why don't you ask Brian."

Now everyone looks at Brian and he smiles. "I'm back on the team." Everyone is happy. We high-five and there's lots of talking. But Brian whistles and everyone is quiet again, and we all look at him. "I want you all to know I'm going to be a team player. I'm not gonna hog the ball and I'm going to run the plays like I'm supposed to. Besides, I think we have a new superstar in the family." He looks down at me.

I smile real big and everyone looks at me and agrees with him.

"We just have to wait for her to grow up a little bit," Adam says, smiling at me. "Ok, now on a more serious note, the big game is tomorrow. That means no going out tonight, no drinking beer, just staying at home and resting up. Everybody got that?"

Everyone seems to be in agreement and I can hear lots of them say, "ok dad," while they're laughing.

It should be a fun night tonight with everyone home.

* * *

After dinner Hannah and Adam talk to me and Guthrie about drinking beer. They don't yell at us, they just talk to us and let us ask all kinds of questions. When we're done talking everyone else comes into the living room.

I like it when everyone is home at night. Crane and Daniel are playing their guitars and singing a song, and Brian has his harmonica out and he's playing along. I snuggle up on the couch next to Hannah and listen.

"You look happy," Hannah says.

"I am," I tell her while yawning.

"You also look exhausted. Why don't you go to bed. You've had a very long day."

"No, I'm not tired." But really I am. I think about the day. I walked to the river where I got yelled at by Brian and my head almost exploded. I got to play polo, and what else happened today? My body jumps a little and I open my eyes.

"See, you were asleep there for a minute," Hannah says. She's smiling at me.

"No, I was just resting my eyes." I feel like resting them some more and I try to keep them open for as long as I can but I can't. I feel like I'm flying now and my body jumps a little. When I open my eyes I'm not flying but instead I'm being carried upstairs and then I close them again.

* * *

It's dark outside when I wake up. I look at my clock. 4:30. Today's the big game! I get up quickly and run to the boy's room. When I open the door I yell, "get up you guys! The big game's today!" No one's waking up so I yell it again. When I start to hear groans I yell it again until I hear Crane say, "it's four in the morning! Go back to bed!" Ford throws a pillow at me but I don't care because they're awake. I leave and yell downstairs to Guthrie and Brian.

"Wake up you guys! Wake up! The game's today!" I hear a door open and I look down the hall and see Adam standing in his doorway.

"What's going on?" He asks.

"The big game's today!" I yell.

"Go back to bed, it's four in the morning!"

"Yeah, go back to bed!" I hear Brian yell from downstairs.

"But the big game is today. Aren't you excited?"

"Not yet," Adam says. "Go to bed!"

"Well I'm excited!" I mumble as I go back to my room.

* * *

It's a hectic morning. My brothers have to be at the polo field early so they can practice a little before the game. They're all running around crazy. Guthrie and I watch them from the porch as they throw all the polo equipment in the back of the truck and then they all pile in. We run down the steps waving to them as they drive away, yelling bye and good luck to them.

"I sure hope they win," I say to Guthrie.

"Oh, I know they're gonna win!" He says back. "I just wish we could leave now instead, and watch practice, instead of going just before the game starts."

"I know. What'd you wanna do while we wait?"

"Let's climb the tree."

We both start climbing up the big oak tree in the front yard. We climb as high as we can go and sit up there talking about the game until we hear Hannah calling our names.

"We're up here," I yell down.

"Well get down, it's time to go."

We climb down fast and run over to the jeep where she's waiting for us. We all get in and Hannah drives us to the game. I fell really excited.

* * *

It's really crowded when we get to the polo field. I think the whole town is here! Hannah goes to find a seat in the bleachers and Guthrie and I run to the sidelines. We yell and wave to our brothers, who are out on the field practicing. We're standing there watching when a man walks up to us.

"No kids on the sidelines," he says. He's wearing a black and white striped shirt and has a whistle around his neck. "You gotta be twelve or older to be here."

I look up at him and say, "but I got to be here for the rest of the games. Why can't I now?"

"It's the big game and I can't let any little kids be on the sidelines," he says.

"But those are my brothers out there," I tell him.

"Sorry. No little kids on the sidelines."

I'm getting mad and I feel like yelling at him, especially for calling me little, but Guthrie says, "Heidi don't get mad, just go sit by Hannah."

I glare at the man before I stomp off the field and go try to find Hannah.

When I find her on the bleachers she's sitting half way up and on the side. It's so crowded on the bleachers I walk over to the side where she's sitting and climb up to her. "Hannah, that mean man on the field won't let me be on the sidelines." I point to him. "He also said I was little."

She smiles and says, "I'm sorry. You can sit here next to me."

I sit down and I get bored fast. "Hannah, can I get something from the snack bar before the game starts?"

"Sure." She gets some money out of her purse and hands it to me.

"A whole dollar? Thanks Hannah!" They only sell candy and sodas at the snack bar because it's so small. A dollar could buy a lot of candy.

"Get something for me too," she says smiling at me.

I climb down the side of the bleachers and walk underneath them to make my way to the snack bar. I can see from here there's a long line.

"Hey McFadden!" I hear someone yell behind me. And I know exactly who it is. Gary!

I turn around and sure enough it is. "What'd you want!" I yell.

"Your brothers better win this game!"

"I know, I know. Will you just leave me alone! This isn't school, I can beat you up here and I won't get in trouble." He doesn't seem to be scared by that. That's weird. He knows I can beat him up.

"Whatcha got in your hand?" He asks.

I crumple my dollar up real tiny and squeeze my hand shut real tight. "Nothing! Now leave me alone!"

"It's money! Give it to me!" He says.

"Are you crazy? I'm not giving this to you. I'd like to see you try to take out of my hand. I'd punch you so fast..." He's taking a step towards me and I take a step towards him.

"Give it to me!" He says smiling.

"Make me!" I don't know why he's not scared of me.

"Give it to him!" A voice yells behind me, and I know that voice too. It's his older brother Rick! I turn around. I'm scared of Rick. He used to go to my school until he got expelled for selling pot. Gary and Rick think it's ok to fight girls and hit them. "I said give it to him!" He yells again.

I'm in the middle of them and there's nowhere for me to run, and no one is under the bleachers besides us. I give the dollar to Gary and he smiles at me. "Thanks little girl!" He says.

"Don't tell anyone," Rick says. "You wouldn't want your brother, Guthrie, to get beat up would you?" They both walk away laughing and I sit on the ground and cry.

Why do they have to be so mean. I look at them over in the snack bar line. I can't tell any of my brothers right now because they're all on the field. I guess I could tell Hannah. No, I can't tell anyone. I don't want to ruin a happy day. But now I don't have any money. I can't bring something back for Hannah. I'll just wait here for a while and maybe she'll forget.

I can hear the game is starting. I don't feel like watching it so I'm gonna sit here for a while. I've got to think of a plan to make Gary leave me alone. I think for a while but nothing pops into my head. I see Rick and Gary walking over here so I get up quickly and run away. The only way to get away from them is if I sit with Hannah. I climb up the bleachers and sit next to her.

"What's the score?" I ask.

"Two to two," she says. "Hey, where's my candy?"

"I'm sorry Hannah. I ran into a friend at the snack bar and she didn't have enough money to buy what she wanted. I let her have some of mine. Was that ok?" I look up at her and I feel like crying because I'm so sad.

She looks down at me and says, "are you crying? It's ok Heidi, I'm not mad at you. I'm glad you helped your friend." She puts her arm around me and gives me a little squeeze. "Where's your candy?"

"We ate it over by the snack bar." I feel bad for lying.

"Come on, watch the game. That'll make you happy!"

We watch the game and it cheers me up. My brothers win and Hannah and I run out to the middle of the field to celebrate with them. Crane sees me coming and he picks me up and swings me around.

"We've got some celebrating to do tonight!" Adam yells.

Everyone agrees and we all high-five each other and I'm really happy. Out of the corner of my eye I see Gary and Rick walking towards a car. I swear I'm gonna find a way to make them never bully me again!

Brian picks me up and walks to the sidelines. I look around at my family and see how happy everyone is. That makes me feel happy. My family is whole again.

* * *

**Thank you so much for reading and reviewing my story! The reviews help motivate me to keep writing, and I'm having a lot of fun writing these stories. I've got a Halloween story coming up next. I hope you'll read it!**


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